Friday, June 14, 2024

"Seven steps to help you stand tall and strong after divorce"/ "How to navigate the financial strain of a divorce"

Mar. 21, 2022 "Seven steps to help you stand tall and strong after divorce": Today I found this article by Sofia Goryn on the Financial Post:


Separation and divorce are never easy. In addition to experiencing tremendous personal emotional toll, women have concerns about their new future, struggle to cope with not being able to see their children every day, and worry about not being able to keep living in their family home.

It is crucial for women at any stage of divorce or separation to find a caring professional to look at their financial situation and answer the most fundamental question of all: “Am I going to be OK?”

You have so many decisions to make, starting with enlisting a trustworthy family lawyer. 

Then, be ready to put in a lot of work to 

organize all your financial information 

and notify the institutions you deal with about your new status.

It is generally advisable to continue living in your family home during this time. If there are children, think about the ideal co-parenting plan.

Gather information and make as complete a list as possible of all your own and your family’s assets and liabilities. 

Family assets accumulated during marriage will usually be divided between you and your spouse.

Make note of your and your spouse’s pension plan, and any government benefits you are or will be receiving.

List all your sources of income, which may now include spousal and child-support payments. 

Make a budget and note your cash flows in and out

A simple Excel spreadsheet can be used, or even a pen and a paper pad.

Review beneficiary designations on any registered accounts in your name, and any insurance policies

Make changes as needed and keep in mind that beneficiary designations supersede the wishes in your will.

Update your will accordingly and as quickly as possible. 

It is important to remember that the dissolution of marriage does not invalidate your will

A qualified estate lawyer will be able to assist with this.

Establish credit in your own name, if you have not already, such as applying for a small loan or a credit card.

Work with a qualified investment adviser who incorporates financial planning into their practice, takes time to ask questions and listens to your concerns. 

A great adviser will help you set goals and milestones for your financial future.

We find that women going through divorce tend to gravitate to female advisers. Have a conversation with the adviser beforehand and ask about their experience with women in your situation. Personal rapport, trust and similar life values are also important.

Stay strong through the process and get through to the other side. You will be OK.

Sofia Goryn is an investment adviser with RBC Dominion Securities, RBC Wealth Management.

Seven steps to help you stand tall and strong after divorce  | Financial Post

Step #1 for men: sign a prenup. You’ll get depar in court otherwise.

Step #2: Make sure you can spend the next 12 years with this woman if you’re planning on having children. 

In other words, do all the things that you should have done before you got married. This applies equally to men.




Jun. 7, 2022 "How to navigate the financial strain of a divorce": Today I found this article by Amy Legate- Wolfe on the Financial Post:


Standing at the altar, nobody thinks they’ll be sitting in a divorce lawyer’s office one day, yet that’s the reality for millions of Canadians each year, and managing the resulting financial hellscape is likely near the top of a divorced couple’s stress list.

“There’s a lot of divorce happening, 2.74 million people applied for divorce in Canada in 2021, 1.88 million in 2020,” Jeanette Power, senior wealth adviser at the Canadian Imperial Bank of Commerce, said. 

“Divorce is all around us. Everyone goes into relationships hoping for the best, but you do really need to prepare for it.”

Canadians also now have the additional strains of worrying about inflation and rising interest rates when going through a divorce. Never mind the pressure from real estate investments. Yet, according to a recent Love & Money survey by Toronto-Dominion Bank, it may not be all bad news.

“After a couple becomes divorced and are a single-income household, more than half, at 54 per cent of respondents, said it’s easier to manage their finances than it was prior to the divorce,” Michael Nitz, district vice-president at TD Canada Trust, said.

But getting to that point is the hard part. That’s why both Nitz and Power recommend meeting with a professional financial adviser as one of your first steps when going through a divorce.

“Canadians going through divorce need a team of professionals around them. They need their emotional support team, and their financial support team,” Power said. “If they have a good team around them and that team can provide 

checklists, 

education, 

webinars in some cases 

or refer a client to different applications, that’s a good start.”

Professionals will also inform you about some of the upfront costs associated with a divorce.

An uncontested divorce costs an average of $1,860 in Canada, according to the 2021 Canadian Lawyer Legal Fees Survey. 

That jumps significantly to $20,625 for a contested divorce.

“If taken to court, it could be over $50,000, depending on the complexity,” Power said. “I have clients who are still dealing with divorce through the courts and it’s three or four years later.”

There are also costs that need to be managed right away. For example, if there are children involved, you may have to pay child support. But two separate homes mean two computers, two internet services, and so on. These everyday costs add up, which is why 

getting your finances in order 

and creating a budget 

and personal financial goals 

with your adviser are a few good first steps.

“There’s a difference between what you need and what you want,” Power said. “So often when we’re budgeting, we have to remind clients that those are two different things.”

In many cases, real estate becomes the largest asset for people going through a divorce. It usually has the largest emotional attachment, too. 

But again, people need to figure out 

what they need, 

and what they can afford.

“Housing and where they live is usually the highest expense, so it’s important Canadians don’t spend beyond their means,” Nitz said. 

“We suggest you find the best mortgage solution as typically your income is reduced, so finding a mortgage solution that will support clients in their new way of living is important.”

But if you’re able to come to an agreement, Power suggests holding off on the sale of your home. The Canadian Real Estate Association recently reported a 12.6 per cent decline in national home sales on a month-to-month basis. 

Until the market stabilizes, it could be a good idea to address this large decision down the road when both former partners have their finances in order.

“Maintain the property even for six months until they can get their heads in a space where they can start downsizing and moving,” she said. “It’s easy to sit there and say you need to sell the house. Emotionally, it’s a completely different conversation.”

Once you’ve dealt with these costs and have a budget underway, it’s time to rebuild. 

That means building up your own credit without your partner. And this can be quite a different experience depending on the age you get divorced.

Power said there has been an increase in “grey divorces,” couples who have been together for 20 years or more. In this case, their credit history has usually been built together, making it difficult for the newly single to even apply for a mortgage for a new home.

“In a lot of the grey divorces, the credit cards or loans were always in joint, but not always individual where they don’t have their own credit established,” she said.

For younger people going through divorce, Nitz said the Love & Money survey noticed a shift away from this joint-financial thinking. But other issues have come up.

In the survey, 

49 per cent of Canadians under 40 said they didn’t have a joint account with their spouse, 

and 63 per cent said they didn’t have shared credit cards. 

Furthermore, this generation was less tolerant of “red flag financial behaviours,” Nitz said, with 81 per cent saying they would be concerned if a potential partner was secretive about finances.

“Typically, millennials keep their banking more separate,” he said. 

“About 60 per cent of Canadians say it’s harder to find true love than financial success.

We hope it’s easier to find financial success because they’ve met with an adviser.”

That doesn’t mean future relationships are set up for failure. Both Nitz and Power said couples should meet with professional advisers together as often as they can. 

This allows for better communication and transparency, creating a more open and honest relationship.

After the emotional stress and financial strain of divorce is under control, people say they have become more financially stable. 

About 57 per cent said they spend less and are more in tune with their budget, according to the Love & Money survey.

“Nobody knows what’s going to happen. Marriage is expensive, but divorce is even more so,” Power said. 

“If the time comes, you want to be prepared. You don’t want to make decisions based on emotions.”

How to navigate your finances during a divorce | Financial Post


"“There’s a lot of divorce happening, 2.74 million people applied for divorce in Canada in 2021, 1.88 million in 2020,” These numbers seem weirdly out of line with reality. Stats Can says there were about 43,000 divorces in 2020 and the number has been trending down. Lots of failed applications? The authors and editors should have thought about what those numbers would mean in a country with a total population of less than 40 million.


The laws in Canada are such that men, especially successful men, want to avoid marriage. When the laws change, in 100 years maybe, I tend to think the impact on marriage will be positive.


  1. Easy solution-dont get married.

    Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free- or at least a lot cheaper

    • Never get married.


    • These are the other 2 blog posts:

      "Popping the prenup question"/ "There are risks to sharing your spouse's debt: expert"



      "5 steps to stop feuding financially with your partner"/ "As Valentine's Day nears, third of Canadian couples say they fight about spending"




      My week:


      Tues. Jun. 11, 2024 "Loblaws boycott: These Canadian shoppers say they’re done with the grocery giant forever": Today I found this article by Elianna Lev on Yahoo:

      Erin: Loblaws is at least $6 for pickup, and at least $10 plus tip for delivery. 

      At Walmart it’s free to pick up, which means now I don’t have to plan my grocery shopping. 

      I can literally put an order in while I'm sitting at work and pick it up after work, it doesn’t cost me anything. Life has gotten easier because of this boycott.

      Rick: I've been using local markets, butchers, bakers, farmers markets, Walmart and Costco. I moved my prescriptions to Costco and found big savings.




      Sat. Jun. 8, 2024 The Community Yard Sale: I went there in the morning.  There were 8 tables.  Today was cold, cloudy, with some rain.

      Kid's things: clothes, books, toys, bikes

      Adult's things: clothes, books, toys, jewelry

      The Department Store job interview: I went to this interview in the afternoon.  This was average.  I will write about more of this in my job interviews email/ blog post. 

      Haircut: I then took the bus to Chinatown.

      E- Mona Beauty Salon: I usually go here.  However, I was a walk-in.  There were a couple people ahead of me and there could be an hour wait.  The haircut would cost $25.

      I was reading a book for 15 min, and then decided to check out other salons. 

      9431 Jasper Ave



      New Oscar Beauty Salon: I crossed the street.  There wasn't a wait.  I got my haircut for $28.

      This is the same amount of time to wash my hair and get cut from shoulder length to my chin: 20 min.

      10538 97 St. NW

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