Jan. 10, 2018 "'Never apologize, never explain' and other bad ideas for managing millennials": Today I found this article by Karl Moore in the Globe and Mail:
Associate professor at McGill University and an associate fellow at Green Templeton College, Oxford University.
A famous quote is "never apologize, never explain."
I have heard this used by a number of executives. I am not sure it's ever worked, but with millennials, I believe that you need to apologize easily and almost always explain.
One of the key elements of postmodern thought, which I argue is the worldview that universities have been teaching millennials, is that there is more truth with a small "t" than there used to be and that there are many more and diverse sources of it. This stands in considerable contrast to the Modern thought that my fellow boomers were typically brought up on.
You never had to explain because you had the truth, you were in charge, you had the power, you were the big dog.
This one hierarchical view of absolute truth is simply beyond passé. Ironically, the truth of the matter is that we all have truth to some degree, and my millennial employees have views which are more "with it" and often more valuable than mine.
Not only humbly, but perhaps importantly, I need to seriously listen to my much younger employees if we are going to perform well in today's turbulent business environment.
Not only humbly, but perhaps importantly, I need to seriously listen to my much younger employees if we are going to perform well in today's turbulent business environment.
Hence, I need to explain virtually every significant decision, because they want – almost must – hear it from me. At the same time, I need their reactions, insights and ideas on how to improve my thinking to be more in line with what's actually happening. I need to learn to take their input and pivot off in somewhat – or sometimes considerably – different directions than I thought.
Recently I had to miss a class, something I have not done in 20 years of undergraduate teaching, other than for my mother's funeral. In the distant past, I would have just told them I would not be there and leave it at that. Not today. I explain what I am doing and why. If I am embarrassed to do so, I probably shouldn't be doing what I am thinking of doing.
My opinion: That stood out to me because that's a good tip.
My opinion: That stood out to me because that's a good tip.
Even more fundamentally, I genuinely want their input on things to improve my ideas, strategies and new directions. Two heads are better than one, so why wouldn't five heads be better than one? So these days, I explain virtually everything I am going to do and then be quiet, listen and re-calibrate.
Real-world input makes a world of difference. Of course, once in a while there is something rightly confidential that I don't or can't explain. But I've found that if you explain most things, millennials are forgiving and understanding in instances when you can't; they have learned to trust you.
Real-world input makes a world of difference. Of course, once in a while there is something rightly confidential that I don't or can't explain. But I've found that if you explain most things, millennials are forgiving and understanding in instances when you can't; they have learned to trust you.
"Never apologize" just sounds so arrogant in today's world. We are all imperfect; we all fall short. Apologizing easily and quickly is what millennials want, and I absolutely agree with them.
It is just plain common sense and appropriate to have humility in 2018. Think of all the arrogant men caught up in sexual harassment; not only do mere apologies not suffice, but their apologies have generally rang hollow and only turned more people against them. Millennials appreciate heartfelt apologies because it reflects humility.
It is just plain common sense and appropriate to have humility in 2018. Think of all the arrogant men caught up in sexual harassment; not only do mere apologies not suffice, but their apologies have generally rang hollow and only turned more people against them. Millennials appreciate heartfelt apologies because it reflects humility.
We older generations are in charge, and that is largely fine. However, we need to realize that at times we are a bit out of touch with today's values. We must be willing to learn new approaches with the good sense to realize that they are generally – though not always – right for today's world.
So today, be willing to easily apologize and almost always, with rare exceptions, explain. Millennials will like you for it, and better business results will generally ensue. And that's why we pay you the big bucks.
"Leadership advice goes beyond 140 characters": Today I found this article by Jill Birch in the Globe and Mail:
Founder and CEO, Birch Grove Inc., Toronto
I guess I'd just had it that day. I was going through countless feeds on LinkedIn, Twitter and Instagram dominated by leadership quotations and an insane number of prescriptive lists. You know them: 5 tools to create better followers; 7 traits of successful leaders; 10 tips to change corporate culture.
You also know the tallies and counts they rack up; a good quotation presented by a leadership guru often garners 500 comments and 1,000 hearts in a matter of minutes. These digital dialogues constitute a growing form of leadership development, which is troubling given the kind of nurturing today's leaders need.
These quotes are meant to impart leadership knowledge. John Maxwell, acclaimed as one of the world's pre-eminent leadership experts, says, "If you want to lead on the highest level, be willing to serve on the lowest."
Dan Rockwell, author of the most socially shared leadership blog, inspires us to "Imagine a way to maximize your leadership effectiveness even more."
Lolly Daskal, one of North America's most sought-after leadership coaches, tells us that "great leaders change the world around them, but they start by changing from within."
Combined, these experts have close to four million followers – and that's just on Twitter. Their quotes are truisms that confirm what we – especially those of us who've been leading for a while – already know. But all that these sentiments do is ... nothing.
They may lead you to believe you'll have a better day because you've read them. But at the end of that day, or that week, you won't be a better leader because you scanned an adage while getting ready for work.
They may lead you to believe you'll have a better day because you've read them. But at the end of that day, or that week, you won't be a better leader because you scanned an adage while getting ready for work.
And this brings me to three aspects of digital leadership development that are disconcerting. First, do leaders have the will to dig deeper? Many gurus expect you to take the bait of a digital quote to get to substance.
The bait urges – surprise, surprise – the purchase of a book, a screensaver or an online seminar.
The bait urges – surprise, surprise – the purchase of a book, a screensaver or an online seminar.
But we know how this will go, as a high-powered Toronto-based not-for-profit executive recently told me, "I've just written a book but I don't have time to read books." A really confusing comment coming from someone who wants you to read his book. Things become murky when sales motives merge with leadership development.
This leads to a second problem. Leaders play the "time-poor" card – the "I'm-too-busy-to-read-anything-beyond-a-couple-of-paragraphs." As one Vancouver leader admitted recently, "I'm swamped, and I don't even know where to begin to look."
How will anyone gain insight into collaboration, change-making or team dynamics by skimming a few bullet points? This brings us to a common behaviour of busy leaders; deferring to the Jack Welch school of decision-making by relying on gut and experience.
But here, too, there's a problem. Good decisions, made even last year, can have disastrous consequences today. It's these very blind spots and knee-jerk reactions that produce ill-informed judgments.
Most concerningly, by losing the knack for learning, we're letting ourselves off the hook as leaders. Few people seem to have the patience any more to absorb text beyond 140 characters; even a 60-second video seems long these days. But when we fail to think deeply about what it means to be a leader, we can't grapple with how we are leading and how our leadership affects others.
Relational leadership, for example, is a new way to think about leadership. Few people I talk to have heard of it; they tell me they'll Google it. Most think it means being nicer, but it doesn't. Relational leadership is all about how we lead and how we relate with others – the informalities of formal leadership, if you will. It is the least understood aspect of leadership today.
It's no wonder we live in what's tirelessly described as a disruptive world; people are asleep at the wheel of their own leadership development. And guess what? By the time your organization notices you're slipping up, they're not likely to recommend a program or a coach. They'll simply fire you.
We are time-poor, have less patience and are inundated with messages of leadership hope (and hype). Leaders today are not learning fast or well enough to gain the knowledge they need to keep pace with the world. Scandals at Uber, VW, Home Capital, Samsung and numerous world governments bear this out.
If you've made it to the end of this article, thanks for hanging in. Now, do yourself a favour. Rather than spending 30 minutes reading quotes, be a disruptor in your leadership learning. Start asking questions, think beyond the quotes, tips and tricks. Once you do, urge others to join the conversation. Then, if you really have staying power, ask yourself a simple question: "How do I lead?" You will surprise yourself by how much and how little you know.
Now, let me give you my leadership quote, wink-wink – "If you can't make the time or find the resources to learn how to be a better leader, you shouldn't be leading."
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