Friday, December 17, 2021

grey issues (Part 1)/ Justin Berry/ intervention/ abortions

Feb. 21, 2020 Grey issues: There is not all right or wrong, good or bad in these cases.

A lapse in judgement:


A person swearing in front of a big crowd:


Concert: In summer 2010, I went to the Winston Churchill Square.   It was in the daytime and there were young people there like kids.  This band  (not famous) plays and after the performance, this white guy in his 30s goes to mike:


I can't quite remember what he said, but he wasn't angry and he said "f----ing" by accident.  He then apologized a few times right afterwards. 


Tyra Banks talk show: Tyra interviews party girls.  One woman in her 20s said this:


Woman: Just because I like to party sometimes doesn't like make me like f----ing Lindsay Lohan.

Tyra: You just swore on my show.


The woman didn't apologize.


Bad teacher comparisons: I wrote about this before.


Gr. 9 math class:


Ms. Selk: And that's why I have to keep bitching at you guys just so you would do your homework.

Erin: You just swore at us.

Ms. Selk is surprised a bit.

Ms. Selk: Yeah, well I had to, to get you to do your homework.


Love Rehab/ bad teacher comparisons




I told this to my friend/ co- worker Adam.  He is a white guy in his late 30s and he says about a teacher swearing at the class was "A lapse in judgement."


Justin Berry: I was telling Adam about him.


Tracy: Justin gets a webcam to meet new people and make new friends, specifically girls.

Adam snorts.

Tracy: Why are you laughing?

Adam: Well he's a 13 yr old boy, so of course.


Tracy: Later a guy says he will pay him $50 if he takes his shirt off on webcam for a few min.  So he does.

Adam: That's a bad decision.

Tracy: What?  Why did you say that?  When that happened, Berry was all like: "Yeah, I take my shirt off at the pool, so what's the big deal if I take my shirt off on webcam?"  I thought the same thing.


Adam: Yeah, but when you take your shirt off at the pool, it's because you're at the pool.  If you take your shirt off on webcam, then it's on webcam.  What you do on the internet, stays on the internet.


This is from a Feb. 2019 blog post "Staying connected"/ "Benefits with friends":


Jan. 29, 2019 Gr. 7 eating disorder flashback: I wrote about this before, but I will write about it again.

It was at lunchtime.
Ashley goes to throw out something.  Angela then tells me, Leslie, Heidi, and Spyrola.

Angela: Whenever she thinks she ate too much, she throws it up so she won't get fat.
We all say "That's bad."
Ashley comes back.

Angela: I just told them that after you think you ate too much, you throw it up so you won't get fat, and all 4 of them say that's bad.

Ashley: I've only done it like 5 times.

I thought Ashley was going to yell at Angela: "Why did you tell them that?  This is personal and private."


You guys are either:


"That's good that Angela told 4 peers that.  She wants to help Ashley and show her that 4 peers thinks this action is bad, so stop doing it."


"That's bad that Angela told 4 peers that personal and private information.  I won't be telling Angela anything personal and private."


"Angela should be telling Ashley's parents or a teacher about this.  They are the ones who have authority and Ashley will listen to them."


Bulimia: I read a Teen magazine article prior to that.  It was something about a teen girl who occasionally throws up so she won't get fat.  Then she did it daily, and didn't go to sleepovers and overnight trips because she was afraid someone will find out about her problem. 


Helping people: I like to help people and solve problems.  That's why I like to read advice columns and charity, and celebrities donating to charity.


Jan. 31, 2019: I was thinking about my friend/ old boss A.  He's a white guy in his late 30s.  I tell him something and he said: "What would you have done?"


After that, I didn't tell anyone about Ashley's habit.  I guess I could have told a teacher about it.  However, Ashley said she did it 5 times and it wasn't something she does often.


"Staying connected"/ "Benefits with friends"




Feb. 22, 2020 Intervention: The correct term that Angela was doing by telling 4 peers about Ashley's problem was intervention.


Too many variables: At the time, it was the end of gr. 7, and Angela didn't really know the 4 of us that well.  It wasn't until gr. 8 that she, Leslie, Heidi, and I started getting closer.


It could have gone badly like:


One of us could have sided with Ashley:


Tracy: Yeah, well throwing up after you eat because you're afraid of getting fat is bad and all, but being fat is worse.


One of us could have told other people about Ashley's problem: How did Angela or anyone know that the 4 of us aren't going to tell other classmates about this?


What influences you the most?: In gr. 12 (2002-2003), I was always on this Edmonton youth website called youthone.com (I just checked and it closed.)


It was from the magazine called Mosaic magazine for teens in Edmonton.  Also closed.  There is another magazine by that name though.


It was created by Leo Wong: 


Leo Wong - MacEwan University




I always created polls for them: 


What influences you the most:


Friends - 46%

Family- 43%

School- 6%

TV- 5%


I remember asking Angela this back then, and she said TV.  I don't know if she remembers that.


I said TV of course.  I'm always watching TV because I love TV and I wanted to be a TV writer and producer back then.  I'm always quoting from TV shows and movies back then to be funny.  I still quote from The Simpsons.


Ashley: I don't know what influences her the most, but it seems like Angela went with the friends route with the intervention.


Jun. 24, 2021 Intention, strategy, and results:

Intention: Angela's intention was to get the 4 peers to say that throwing up after you eat because you're afraid of getting fat is bad, and that Ashley will listen to the 4 peers.

Strategy: Angela tells the the 4 peers to say that throwing up after you eat because you're afraid of getting fat is bad.

Results: Ashley does listen and she defends herself by saying she only did it 5 times.  I don't know if she exactly stopped doing that.


This is a Aug. 2013 blog post:

joke flops/ funny and annoying/ funny wedding video



Sexual harassment: I've mentioned this before.  This was the worst joke flops I have ever seen.  It was also in gr. 10 and this guy was pretending he was interested in my friend by saying disgusting and sexual things to her for 20 min.  He was suffering from delusions of grandeur that he thought was so funny, but no one else was, especially my friend.  He also suffered from low level of emotional intelligence because he couldn't see how offended my friend was.  It's not until she cried and walked out that he was like: "Oh my God, I totally offended her."




Intention: He wanted to be funny.

Strategy: He thought by pretending he was interested in my friend by saying disgusting and sexual things to her.  He was 100% fake, and everybody knew it was fake.

Results: My friend was offended, scared, disgusted, and upset.

Oct. 23, 2021 Justin Berry hypothetical situation: What if he, Tracy, and Adam are all 13 yrs old and he tells us that he took his shirt off on webcam and got $50?

Tracy: That's good.
Adam: That's a bad decision.

I don't know who Berry is going to listen to.

Nov. 18, 2021: Or what if Berry tells 4 of his friends that?  3 of them said "That's good" and 1 said "That's a bad decision."

Or what if Adam tells 4 friends what Berry did, and all of 4 them said: "That's good."



Feb. 22, 2020 Starting Over TV show: This is a reality TV show.  There was a season 1 ep called "Confronting a Roommate,"  There are 6 women who live together and are making changes in their lives.  The 5 roommates all think Teresa has a drinking problem.


Cut to Teresa's daughter visiting and Teresa said she had 2 drinks already.


Cut to the roommates go on a road trip, and Teresa tells PJ not to tell Kimberlyn she ordered a 2nd drink.


Cut to the time Teresa and 2 others win this massage and Teresa goes for the champagne first.


The 2 life coaches Rhonda, Rana, and a psychologist all intervene.


Brenda: If you don't get control of your drinking, then you can't get control of your life



Dec. 13, 2020 Post Secret:




Sept. 12, 2021:


Oct. 10, 2021:


[on back]
I stopped eating normally when my mom started calling me a pear. at 10.



Aug. 15, 2021 "Are people really this dumb?": I have written about this before where Angela asks that about Justin Berry taking off his clothes and doing sexual things on webcam for money.

Angela: Are people really this dumb?  By the time you get to this age (13), don't you kind of know what's right and wrong by then?  I think he knew what he was doing was kind of wrong, so I don't see him as 100% victim.

People going up to strangers and asking personal and private questions: This was when I was in gr. 9.  I was talking to this girl also named Tracy at her locker.  There were these 2 gr. 8 girls sitting by, a red head and a blonde.

Red head: Hey.
I turn to her.
Red heard: Are you anorexic?
Me (I give this confused look): No.
Blonde (to Red head): Why did you ask her that? 

My opinion: I was not offended by that question.  When I asked my friends: "If someone asked you if you were anorexic, would you take that as a compliment?"

My sister S (19 yrs old): No, because they think you have a problem.

My friend Tamara (17 yrs old): No, because they think you have a problem.

My friend Leslie (17 yrs old): Yes.

At Youthone.com, I created polls for them.

60% of the poll who answered were girls.  1/3 of the girls said yes, they would see that as a compliment.

Some of you may be saying: "Are people really this dumb to be asking personal questions to a stranger?"

Race question: If you are the same race as another person, you can go up to a stranger and ask what they are exactly.  It's like an Asian person going up to another Asian person and asking: "Are you Chinese, Japanese, Korean, etc."  That's not offensive.


The girl who's in a religion that doesn't allow her to talk to boys: I wrote about this so much about gr. 9 health class.  Miss. Johnston says there's a girl in gr. 7 or 8 and she's in a religion that doesn't allow her to talk to boys.  When you know the grade, you can find the girl.

Erin raises her hand and asks in front of the whole class.
Erin: Can you tell me what her exact grade is?  I promise I won't tell anyone.
Miss. Johnston: No, so you can tell everybody that there is a girl who's in this grade and she's in a religion that doesn't allow her to talk to boys?  No.

Some of you may be saying: "Are people really this dumb to ask the one question you're not allowed to ask?  Or if you ask, you're obviously not going to get know that."



May 6, 2021 Applying for jobs at companies that aren't going very well: 

Sears: In 2015, I was working part-time at my 1st restaurant job, and I was looking for a 2nd job.  I looked into Sears.  For the last 5 years, I have been reading the business section of the newspaper and they're all about locations closing and layoffs.  Do you still want to apply to this company? 

I didn't, because I liked working at restaurants more.

New restaurants: I found this article "Restaurant Profitability and Failure Rates: What You Need to Know" by Rory Crawford in FSR magazine (Full Service Restaurant).

"The statistics aren’t pretty. Sixty percent of restaurants don’t make it past their first year and 80 percent go out of business within five years."

I have applied and interviewed at 6 restaurants in 2018-2019, and they have closed down within 2 years.  Those years weren't really good for me, and I needed a job and I was willing to work at a place where there was a high chance I didn't see the restaurant lasting.


Call Centres: I worked at Call Centre #1 in 2005-2006.  I got laid off in 2006.  A month later I was able to get a job at Call Centre #2 and worked for 5 months before I quit to go to Professional Writing at MacEwan full-time.

There used to be like 5 call centres in Edmonton from like 2005-2007.

Actor: There isn't really any job security in this job.  

Jun. 24, 2021 A person marrying someone so he or she can stay in the country: It was done on That 70s Show where Lori marries Fez so he can stay in the country.  That does happen in real life.  I was a casual watcher of this show.

Pro: He or she is your friend and you want him or her to stay in the country with you.

Con: This is a sham marriage and they don't really love each other.

I'm sure some of you guys are saying: "That's a bad decision."


music/ abortion/ job search



This is from Jul. 2009:

Abortion: Anyway that best man speech really "jumped the shark." That means a show has hit it's lowest point. That reminds me of Cheaters. There was this woman who found out her boyfriend was cheating on her and she yells at him: "I even got an abortion for you, I should have kept that f---ing baby."

I felt so sorry for her. She needs counselling. At that time I was like 19. At first I was kind of confused because why would you want to keep a baby by a guy who's a total scumbag? But then I realized that she didn't agree with a decision that he made. She wanted to keep her boyfriend, and she should have really gotten rid of him, and kept the baby.

I remember telling this to my friend Leslie back in 2004. We were at Wendy's and it was the end of summer. We were going to watch the Jet Li movie Hero afterwards. I thought Leslie was going to be agreeing with me and saying that it was sad. Instead it was different.

L: Well actually it's a good thing that she did get an abortion. If she kept the kid and raised it as her own, then she wouldn't even have enough money for her own retirement.

I told this to Ray awhile back.

R: Well it seems that this woman is not ready to have a baby because she put her boyfriend ahead of the baby.

Anyway, I hope people (women) who do watch this show will realize that even if you get an abortion to keep your boyfriend, your boyfriend may still cheat on you and leave you.

That also reminds me of another ep where this woman got pregnant and her boyfriend was cheating on her.

Woman: When I got pregnant, he was trying to convince me to get an abortion even though he knows I'm totally against that. If I find out he's cheating on me, I'm going to leave him. I'm going to be a single mom.

I felt this ep had also a really "jump the shark" moment because the boyfriend stabbed the host Joey Greco. Seriously, I saw it.





Jun. 30, 2021: Abortions are a really grey issue.

I have known Leslie for years, and I really thought she was going to say what I thought like: "That's really bad that you got an abortion and you regretted it."

Instead she didn't really seem to feel sorry for the woman who had an abortion and regretted it.  She talked about finances.

I don't know, maybe Leslie did feel sorry for her, but didn't show it.

Ray Anne was like 16 yrs old.  She and I worked at the Soup place together in 2008- 2009.  She worked 1 or 2 days a week and we talked a lot about abortions and teen pregnancy.  I didn't know what Ray Anne was going to say.  She didn't seem like she felt sorry for the woman who had an abortion and regretted it.  

I remember telling this to my friend/ co-worker Meghan at the Clothing Store #1 in 2005.

Meghan: Why would you want to have a baby with a guy who cheated on you?
Tracy: Yeah, I thought that too.  But she wanted to have the baby, even if the guy cheated on her.




This week's there isn't a theme, but here are the 2 other blog posts:

Post Secret- holidays (Part 1)/ Post Secret (Part 10)




Post Secret- holidays (Part 2)/ Post Secret (Part 11)





My week: 

Dec. 12, 2021 Little Debbie bakery: I was at Shoppers Drug Mart and they were selling these Christmas tree cakes (264 grams, 6 cakes) for $1.99.  I decided to try one box and if I don't like it, I will never buy it again.  It was so good.  It was like eating a Twinkie.





"Trio of jockeys in a stable condition in hospital after horror fall in Hong Kong Sprint": Today I found this article by Sam Agers on scmp.com.  I was watching the Chinese news and I saw the accident:

One of the worst race falls in living memory marred Hong Kong’s showcase international meeting at Sha Tin racecourse on Sunday.

Reigning champion jockey Zac Purton from Australia, South African rider Lyle Hewitson and visiting Japanese Yuichi Fukunaga were taken to nearby Prince of Wales Hospital after the horror incident in the Group One Hong Kong Sprint. All three were conscious throughout the ordeal and on Sunday night were reported to be in a stable condition.

The incident began when rank outsider Amazing Star came down under 24-year-old Hewitson at the head of the field as the runners cornered for home, creating a concertina effect that brought down Purton, 38, on favourite Lucky Patch, Karis Teetan, 31, aboard Naboo Attack and 45-year-old Fukunaga on Japanese raider Pixie Knight.

Mauritius-born Teetan walked away unscathed and was able to continue riding, while Amazing Star and Naboo Attack were humanely euthanised as a result of the injuries they suffered. Lucky Patch and Pixie Knight are believed to have escaped serious injury.



Dec. 13, 2021 "Ontario woman adopted as baby meets 91-year-old sister for first time": Today I found this article by Scott Lightfoot on CTV news: 

Margaret Otter grew up in the town of Paris, Ont., knowing her biological family was out there somewhere.

"I always knew from the beginning that I was adopted," Otter told CTV News Toronto. "My adoptive parents told me that I was adopted, and I always knew that someday I'd try to find them. But I lost interest around the age of 13, when I discovered boys. That just took me in a whole different direction."

Just a few kilometres down the road in Brantford, Bea Belair (nee Rutherford) grew up helping to raise her eight siblings. The children knew that two of their sisters had been given up for adoption at birth. There were eleven children in total, their parents had given up the 9th and 11th born girls.


"We were so poor, like really poor," Belair told CTV News Toronto. "They just couldn't afford to have two more, so that's why they let the two girls go."

Over the years, family members made attempts to track down the missing sisters. Otter says she remembers thinking, "'Could I ever meet them? Would I ever meet them?' And then I thought 'would they want to meet me?'

Last year, she got to answer those questions, when her son made a connection on an online genaology website, an uncle living in California.

"I thought no no no, it's probably a scam" said Otter. "But then too many of the pieces of the puzzle started to fit together."

That discovery, led to the now 91-year-old Belair getting a surprising phone call.

"She said 'I'm your baby sister,'" Belair remembers. "I said, 'you've got to be kidding me.' She said 'No, I'm your baby sister.'"

Otter remembers the life-changing call as well. "It's just a shock. She's 91 and she never thought she had any sisters left because they'd all died. All of a sudden, she discovers she's got a baby sister."

For months, Otter, Belair, their brother in California, and their brother in Brantford have been speaking on the phone. Today, the two sisters met in person for the first time. Belair's son, daughter-in-law, and the widow of one of the sisters' brothers made the drive to Toronto.

"On the way down we kept thinking, I wonder who she looks like," said Belair.

Video captured by family members shows the emotional moment as the door to the condo opens, and the two women come together for a long hug.

"The family were looking for me and for her and they never succeed," Otter said. "But technology has allowed so much more to happen now so I'd be so happy to see her. I'd be thrilled to see her and get to know her."  

Ontario woman adopted as baby meets 91-year-old sister for first time | CTV News

Dec. 15, 2021 Something's Missing: I was thinking about one of my favorite songs by John Mayer:

Something's missing
And I don't know how to fix it
Something's missing
And I don't know what it is
No I don't know what it is
At all

Something's Missing - YouTube

Reading TV and movie reviews: I was able to figure out what was missing.  I wasn't doing anything creative.  I reread my TV and movie reviews saved into my email/ blog to get ready to publish.

I also finished reading Jason's script from the Screenwriter's Meetup group.  This was excellent as usual.  

Dec. 16, 2021 Winter: This week is mainly -10 to -20.  When it gets this cold, I don't go out at all unless I have to like when I had to shovel snow.

Travel: One of my old co-workers/ friend Vladimir said he's in Brazil for vacation on Facebook.

I wouldn't travel at this time. 


Dec. 14, 2021 "Organizers of a 'Dash for Cash' in South Dakota apologized for the 'degrading' event, which had teachers scrambling for dollar bills on an ice rink to buy school supplies": Today I found this article by Sarah Jackson on Yahoo news:

Organizers have apologized for an event at a junior hockey game in South Dakota that drew outrage for pitting teachers against each other for dollar bills for their schools.

The Sioux Falls Stampede hockey team, in partnership with CU Mortgage Direct, held their inaugural "Dash for Cash" event on Saturday. A clip from the event quickly made the rounds online, showing a handful of teachers kneeling on a mat in a hockey rink, scrambling for their share of a total of $5,000 in dollar bills and stuffing the cash into their shirts to see how much they could raise in five minutes for their classrooms and schools.

The video garnered criticism for a premise many called "dystopian" and "degrading." The event even drew comparisons to the dystopian Netflix series "Squid Game," with CNN anchor Bill Weir tweeting, "We're just a few sharpened sticks away from public education Squid Game."

The event's organizers issued an apology on Monday for the Dash for Cash, as previously reported by local newspaper Sioux Falls Argus Leader.

"The promotion was intended to help raise funds for area teachers and their classrooms," wrote the Sioux Falls Stampede and CU Mortgage Direct in their statement. "Although our intent was to provide a positive and fun experience for teachers, we can see how it appears to be degrading and insulting towards the participating teachers and the teaching profession as a whole. We deeply regret and apologize to all teachers for any embarrassment this may have caused."

The groups say they received 31 applications and randomly selected 10 teachers to take part in the scramble for cash. Each teacher received at least $500 during the event. The groups say they will give an additional $500 to each of the participating teachers, as well as the other 21 who applied but weren't chosen for the cash grab. All told, the groups will give another $15,500 to area teachers, they said.

Teachers from around the country sometimes spend thousands of dollars a year from their own pocket for supplies for their students and classrooms, Insider previously reported. In 2019, teachers popularized a viral #clearthelist trend to crowdfund money for school supplies.

Organizers of a 'Dash for Cash' in South Dakota apologized for the 'degrading' event, which had teachers scrambling for dollar bills on an ice rink to buy school supplies (yahoo.com)


My opinion: Well at least the organizers apologized and gave the teachers money.

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