Friday, December 2, 2022

"Teach comedy? That's a good one" (Humber College)/ "If You Laugh at These Dark Jokes, You’re Probably a Genius"

May 23, 2016 "Teach comedy? That's a good one": I cut out this article by Andrew Clark on Nov. 29, 2010 in the Globe and Mail:


I am the director of the Toronto-based Humber College Comedy Program. Launched in 2000, it is North America's only diploma-granting course dedicated to the study of stand-up, sketch, improvisation and comic writing. 

This makes for interesting conversation fodder at cocktail parties. When I tell someone my occupation the typical response is: "You run a what? How can you teach that? You're either funny or you're not."

Then they ask me to tell them a joke.

I don't take their skepticism too personally. Most people think comedians emerge fully formed from the womb. We like to think folks are born funny. This is a notion reinforced, to a large degree, by comics themselves, who like the public to see them as genetically engineered comedy geniuses. 

The truth is that in comedy, like everything else, natural ability will only get you so far.

You may have a beautiful singing voice but, in order to become a great singer, you must train your gift. This goes double for the humour business. 

It takes 10 years of work until you know what you're doing and another five until you truly have your own voice. 

Comedy is a technical, demanding career that requires skill, discipline and drive and - oh yeah - funny, lots of natural funny.

At Humber, each year we accept 60 students into the first semester of our two-year program. These are selected from hundreds of applicants who are vetted through a gruelling February-to-May audition process. Some have a bit of experience. Others are completely raw. 

We get them straight out of high school or after a few years of university, and we have enrolled ex-police officers, lawyers, reformed criminals, and pretty much every other profession you can dream up. 

We once accepted a student who said if he didn't get into the program he was going to spend the rest of his life working in a poultry abattoir (luckily he was funny).

When students first arrive, they are surprised to find that the work load is heavy. Those who think that they'll be spending the semester doing Chris Farley impressions are shocked. About 45 make it through to second year.

For the first week we make nice. Then we throw them off the deep end.

We believe that you learn comedy by performing in front of audiences. By day, our students study in the classroom and at night, they are in comedy clubs. Mondays, Humber has a weekly sketch show at The Comedy Bar. 

On Tuesdays, we have a show at Yuk Yuk's. Most of our pupils are out five or more nights a week, taking their chances on stage and then, refreshed by a few hours sleep, showing up for class to hone their technique. 

It's probably the only school in which a professor will spend time in class philosophizing about the appropriate use of profanity. 

It's a crazed lifestyle and they love it.

Early stand-up clubs, such as The Comedy Store and The Improv, were originally seen as workshop venues where performers could hone their craft. In Canada, there used to be no formal training centres. 

A hopeful comedian tried his luck on amateur night; if he had some success, he bought himself a used car and the feature acts hired him to open for them. That was the tuition.

I'm often asked if I am a comedian myself. I'm not. I cut my teeth writing journalism and humour for magazines and newspapers. My first book, Stand and Deliver, was a history of Canadian comedy. 

Over time, I branched into screenwriting and I now write the weekly Road Sage column for the Globe's Drive section. This distance is an asset, because running a comedy school is a bit like weathering a hurricane on a daily basis.

We have graduates working in every aspect of the business. 

Many fine comedians today went through our program, such as Debra DiGiovanni and Nikki Payne. 

Humber alumni have written for shows such as The Office and This Hour Has 22 Minutes. 

Jake Labow, head of original programming for the Comedy Network, is a Humber grad.

Yet the program does not just train comedians. The skills required for comedy 

- risk taking, 

thinking on your feet, 

working in a group, 

creatively solving problems 

- are skills that can be applied in any field. 

We have Humber Comedy grads who are police officers, paramedics, venture capitalists, you name it.




Feb. 16, 2017 Humber College: Comedy Writing: I had written this down on a before and now want to type it up.

Our Program

 Humber’s Comedy Writing graduate certificate program provides you with the opportunity to develop comedic writing across different forms, styles and genres of humour. You will examine theories of comedy and the evolution of comedic writing. 

The program includes peer feedback components in which students will be required to write and revise and give and receive constructive criticism on works-in-progress. 

You will gain a practical understanding of the comedy writing industry through engagement with comedy writing professionals. 

You will produce original comedic works ready for publication or recording and gain a practical understanding of the comedic writing and print humour process.

Your Career

 Ontario is home to a large and diverse writing community that consistently employs writing graduates in a wide range of rich and fulfilling careers. 

Graduates from this program will be well prepared to enter industry and find employment opportunities in areas including, but not limited to, freelance writing, publishing, reporting, new media, corporate communications, editing, scriptwriting and content development.
Our Industry Partnerships

 This program is taught by industry experts, providing you with the most up-to-date and relevant curriculum.



Mar. 16, 2017 "If You Laugh at These Dark Jokes, You’re Probably a Genius": This article is by Brandon Specktor on MSN:

 A man walks into a rooftop bar and takes a seat next to another guy. “What are you drinking?” he asks the guy.

“Magic beer,” he says.

“Oh, yeah? What’s so magical about it?”

Then he shows him: He swigs some beer, dives off the roof, flies around the building, then finally returns to his seat with a triumphant smile.

“Amazing!” the man says. “Lemme try some of that!” The man grabs the beer. He downs it, leaps off the roof —and plummets 15 stories to the ground.

The bartender shakes his head. “You know, you’re a real jerk when you’re drunk, Superman.”

Let’s ignore for a moment whether or not that poor rube survived his fall (if it makes you feel better, lets say Trampoline Man was waiting for him on the ground). 

The real question is: Did you find this joke funny? Sick? Maybe a little of both?

According to a new study published in the journal Cognitive Processing, your reaction could indicate your intelligence. 

In the paper, a team of psychologists concludes that people who appreciate dark humor— defined as 'humor that treats sinister subjects like death, disease, deformity, handicap or warfare with bitter amusement and presents such tragic, distressing or morbid topics in humorous terms'

—may have higher IQs, 

show lower aggression, 

and resist negative feelings 

more effectively than people who turn up their noses at it.

To test this correlation between sense of humor and intellect, researchers had 156 male and female participants read 12 bleak cartoons from The Black Book by German cartoonist Uli Stein. 

(One of them, which paraphrases a classic joke, shows a mortician reaching deep into a cadaver as a nurse muses, “The autopsy is finished; he is only looking for his wrist watch.”)

Participants indicated whether they understood each joke and whether they found it funny, then took some basic IQ tests and answered questionnaires about their mood, aggressive tendencies, and educational background.

The results were remarkably consistent: 

Participants who both comprehended and enjoyed the dark jokes showed higher IQs, and reported less aggressive tendencies, than those who did not. 

Incidentally, the participants who least liked the humor showed the highest levels of aggression and the worst moods of the bunch. 

The latter point makes sense when you consider the widely-studied health benefits of laughter and smiling;  if you aren’t able to greet negativity with playful optimism, of course you will feel worse.

 But what about the link to intelligence? According to the researchers, processing a dark joke takes a bit more mental gymnastics than, say, a knock-knock joke

—it’s 'a complex information-processing task' that requires 

parsing multiple layers of meaning, 

while creating a bit of emotional distance from the content so that it registers as benign instead of hostile. 

That emotional maneuvering is what sets dark jokes apart from, 

say, puns, which literally pit your brain’s right and left hemispheres against each other as you process a single word’s multiple meanings, 

but usually don’t force you out of your emotional comfort zone. 

Tina Fey sums up the difference pretty well: 'If you want to make an audience laugh, you dress a man up like an old lady and push her down the stairs. 

If you want to make comedy writers laugh, you push an actual old lady down the stairs.'

The takeaway: Pretty much any joke that relies on wordplay will put your brain to work—dark jokes just require a bit more emotional control to earn a laugh. 

Give your brain a spin with these jokes proven to make anyone sound smart, or, if you do want to test your black humor cognizance, consider the following dark jokes from the Reader’s Digest comedy crypt to exercise your hardened funny bone:

• '‘I’m sorry’ and ‘I apologize’ mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.' —Demetri Martin



Here a couple of dark jokes:


This is from the Aug. 2013 blog post:

joke flops/ funny and annoying/ funny wedding video



The Sausage Factory: I've told you this one before.  Cut to Tracy is 16 and S is 19.  Tracy is watching TV and laughing.  It's The Sausage Factory where Zack and Lisa are having a serious conversation.  It's a TV sitcom without a laugh track, and was on Comedy Network.  This confirms it's supposed to be funny.

S: What are they talking about?
Tracy: She thinks he needs a kidney transplant, and he thinks they're talking about him having a VD.
S gasps and looks scared.
S: Yeah, well did he have sex?
Tracy: No.
S: Yeah, well I don't think they should be joking about something so serious.

I predicted she would not find it funny and be offended by it, but I didn't forewarn her.  I didn't predict that she would be scared. 

Blue: C'mon, a few months prior to it, I told her the joke during the British boy band Blue interview.

Tracy: The question was: "Do you guys own any pets?"  Then Lee says: "My cat committed suicide."
S: Suicide is nothing to joke about.

In the interview Antony burst out laughing.
Lee: Why are you laughing?  My cat committed suicide- that is nothing to laugh about!
Antony: Sorry mate.

I thought it was kind of unintentionally funny.  Antony laughed, so I thought my sister might find it funny.  Hence, she did not.




"This man will pay you $10,000 to find him a girlfriend"/ "Matchmaker, make me a match"/ "Autistic teenager found more than two years after disappearing in California"


Apr. 17, 2022 Friends matchmaker: This was way back in 2006.  My sister majored in business at university and so did my friend Angela.  Angela came over to my house, and at dinner, she met my sister and they talked about school and work.  They got along.  However, they didn't really stay in touch after that like they could add each other on Facebook. 


Here is another example:



Summer Heights High:


"The life of a public school epitomized by disobedient student Jonah Takalua, self-absorbed private school exchange student Ja'mie King, and megalomaniac drama teacher Mr. G."


Summer Heights High (TV Mini Series 2007) - IMDb


Season 1, Episode 4: This is the episode where Jonah draws a picture of his dad touching his privates, so he can get out of English class.


"Ja'mie undermines her relationship with her new friends; Mr. G holds auditions for his new musical; a suggestive drawing puts Jonah's irate father on the defensive."


"Summer Heights High" Episode #1.4 (TV Episode 2007) - IMDb


At the 22-23 min. mark, Jonah, dad, the Teacher and the Counselor are talking about the picture.


(830) Summer Heights High Ep4 - YouTube


When I first saw this in 2010, there was this:


This is:


A. Offensive

B. Funny

C. Both

D. Neither


I was 25 yrs old and I thought this was 95% offensive, and 5% funny.  Now I see this as 99% offensive, and 1% funny.


I remember telling to this to my friends.


Jessica, 23 yrs old: Offensive.

Angela, 25 yrs old: Offensive.

Dan N. 25 yrs old: Both.

Trayton, 20 yrs old: Both.


The people who have similar opinions would probably get along with each other.


Tracy's blog: "This man will pay you $10,000 to find him a girlfriend"/ "Matchmaker, make me a match"/ "Autistic teenager found more than two years after disappearing in California" (badcb.blogspot.com)




This week's other blog posts:


"5 Apps That Turn Your Phone Into a Document Scanner"/ "The Best Mobile Scanning Apps"

Tracy's blog: "5 Apps That Turn Your Phone Into a Document Scanner"/ "The Best Mobile Scanning Apps" (badcb.blogspot.com)

"Knitting: a cure for parent shamers"/ "Taking stock of toddler's tall tales"

Tracy's blog: "Knitting: a cure for parent shamers"/ "Taking stock of toddler's tall tales" (badcb.blogspot.com)


My week:


Nov. 24, 2022 "From vacuums to air fryers, auction houses are cashing in on online shopping returns": Today I found this article by Paula Duhatschek on CBC:


On a bright but chilly Saturday, the parking lot at Ollive's Auction in Calgary is bustling with a steady stream of customers arriving to pick up the treasures they'd won the week before. 

Among them: a $7 vacuum cleaner, an $11 hair dryer brush and two tricycles for $13, sold at a steep discount.

"I don't want to advertise this place because it's a gem," said shopper Pat Knecht, who picked up the vacuum cleaner along with a lamp, some storage bins and a dozen picture frames. "You can get some really good deals."

Items at Ollive's Auction can be found at a steep discount because they've likely been purchased and returned once already. The business is among a growing number of auction houses whose bread and butter has become selling off returned and excess merchandise. 

That line of business has grown as online shopping, and online returning, have become ever more popular — with some research suggesting 30 per cent of what's bought online ends up being sent back. For retailers, the price of shipping, processing and restocking returns can be steep, and liquidation is one way to deal with it.


Nov. 26, 2022 Black Friday: I didn't go shopping and I never really do on this day.  I read the business news on CBC and BNN Bloomberg, that most Canadians are more cautious with their spending during the holiday season due to inflation.

I hardly buy things to own.

Nov. 25, 2022 Tao of Dana: This was on her Facebook page:

“It’s 100% off if you don’t buy it.” ✨
I’m always reminded of that little phrase during massive holiday sale season, when it’s so tempting to buy things that aren’t needed or wanted because… it’s a great deal!
That said, I’m deep into 🎁 Black Friday shopping and it’s definitely fun.
But, it’s really empowering to take stock of all you already have. Especially before a big shopping spree!
Whether you make gratitude lists 📝, tell people how much you appreciate them💖, literally take stock of all you have in your closets 👗, drawers, pantry and thank all of it… even thank your home, your neighborhood, speak words of gratitude before eating a meal…
This is where things become richer, more energized, more fulfilling and magnetic.
You’ll likely find you want to shop less— or shop far more selectively—and you’ll have far less to declutter every year! ♥️
🎉🎁💖 The free Feng Shui Declutter Class is starting soon and you can sign up now at the link in my profile @thetaoofdana . 💖🎁🎉


Nov. 27, 2022 Post Secret:


That post led to nearly $10,000 of donations within 2 weeks! I send all my love to you and to every single person from the PostSecret community and beyond who contributed, as well as those who weren’t able to contribute but still saw the post and hoped on my behalf. You all have made something amazing happen for this 25-year-old woman who is now so excited for the life of independence, freedom, and trust Tango and I are building together.

Thank you for hearing me and helping me that chilly day in Connecticut several years ago, Frank. The secret I shared in that auditorium was one of despair, believing I would never be able to partner with a service dog of my own. I am so grateful to be able to look back on that day and smile because I just didn’t know yet what good fortune was coming my way.

If you would like to make a difference in someone’s life this Giving Tuesday, please consider the following non-profits.

Educated Canines Assisting with Disabilities

Kristin Brooks Hope Center – IMAlive – Crisis Textline

Active Minds – Promoting Student Mental Wellness

(Volunteer As An IMAlive Remote Crisis-Line Worker)


Nov. 29, 2022 The end of the year: I'm writing an email/ blog post where I reflect about all the things I have done this year.  

Did I achieve my goals?

Is there anything else I need to complete?

There is still a month left of the year.

Wheel of life: I have seen this when I read, watch, and listen to these self- development videos and articles.  I have some goals in different areas of my life.





Nov. 30, 2022 "These students are facing real-world economic pressures. Mandatory financial literacy classes may help": Today I found this article by James Dunne on CBC.

I like this article because it's about helping and teaching students on how to manage their finances:

Gary Rabbior is the president of the Canadian Foundation for Economic Education (CFEE) in Toronto, a non-profit that develops financial literacy programs and tools for schools.

He says financial matters — from online shopping, to investing, to managing debt — have become much more complex than they used to be and believes there should be a mandatory financial literacy course taught in high schools across Canada. 

"We owe it to our kids to be able to educate them, to empower them to make the best decisions they can make."




"4 reasons for thrift store gifts this year": Kelsey Sheehy Of Nerdwallet, on BNN Bloomberg.  It's cheaper, good for the environment, support small businesses and the items have a history:

“Estate sales are the gold mine for me,” Clews says. “You can find such magnificent objects that have history, care and wisdom all wrapped up into something meaningful.”

Neighborhood listservs, Facebook marketplace and Buy Nothing groups can also yield treasure, especially if there are children on your to-gift list. Kids age out of toys rather quickly (assuming they take to them at all), and you can often find like-new toys for a few dollars — or better yet, for free.


4 reasons for thrift store gifts this year - BNN Bloomberg


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"Knitting: a cure for parent shamers"/ "Taking stock of toddler's tall tales"

Here are 2 articles about parenting.  I don't have kids, and I never want to have kids.  However, these are well- written articles.


Oct. 31, 2016 "Knitting: a cure for parent shamers": Today I found this article by Perri Klass in the Globe and Mail:


As a pediatrician, I spend many hours thinking and worrying about children and their parents, individually and in the aggregate. But when I have a chance to escape, I like to hang out at Ravelry, a great knitting and crocheting website and, I might add, a notoriously sticky one: People come, and they stay.

I click through 10, 20, 200 versions of the same popular shawl pattern, looking intently at the different yarns that people have used, the color combinations, the way the shawl looks in worsted weight versus fingering versus bulky. Or maybe I start with some yarn from my stash and spend a happy 20 minutes or so looking at all the different projects people have fashioned from that yarn — hats and baby blankets and sweaters and shawls.

It’s soothing and inspiring and relaxing and stimulating, even when certain pattern preferences and color choices are frankly incomprehensible to me. Why put in all that time and effort to knit an elaborate lace shawl, counting stitches and following a complicated chart to get that openwork pattern of leaves and tendrils — but do it all in that peculiarly harsh electric blue? Why spend months on a sweater designed to be elegantly loose and flowing, but deliberately shorten and tighten it so that it cuts right across the belly in a less-than-graceful way?

Here’s the thing about the online knitting world: We look at one another’s projects, and we sometimes shake our heads in silent wonder at the choices other people make. 

But when we comment, we say nice things. Love this. Favorite this. Wow, beautiful, congratulations, great colors. There’s an implicit understanding that when someone posts a photo of a completed project, what you’re seeing is a product of love and care and time, choices and sustained effort — and you should either cheer or else move on.

What, after all, do you gain by pointing out that the colors clash or the fit is not exactly flattering?

Or at least, that’s how it has always seemed to me, from looking at the posted photos and reading the comments that people make, though if someone does post something rude about your project, you can take that comment down. 

So I asked about unkind comments at Ravelry Help, and got an immediate email back from “Sarah,” who told me, “Overall issues are fairly rare. We don’t usually have issues with unkind comments about projects. There are occasional unkind comments regarding patterns or regarding other issues outside of crafts (politics, for example) within the forums.”


So I could draw the obvious conclusion here, which all you knitters (and crocheters) will probably have leapt to long ago: Is it possible that knitting makes us nicer (knicer?) while child rearing makes us crankier and more critical?

There’s an awful lot of public shaming that goes on around being a parent, and I’m not just talking online — or even in the doctor’s office.

And when you’re out in the world with a small child, you know people are looking at you, and you know some of it isn’t kindly. Some parents are so apologetic about their babies’ potential for acting like babies on flights that they hand out goody bags to their fellow passengers in hope of averting adult anger and disapproval. 

But you remember that terrible trip when your own child was screaming on the plane much more distinctly than the many trips when it was someone else’s kid.

Most of us writhe inside when a child acts up in a restaurant, but we don’t really expect the parents to go table to table murmuring, “She’s usually great in restaurants, and that’s why we came so early and we chose this place because it is so clearly not a fancy place where people might come for romantic dinners.”

Tantrums in the toy store — been there. Noise at the library, meltdown in the mall, you name it.

There’s no way to take this public embarrassment out of parenthood — you accept the job of civilizing a child, you test the process by taking that child out into the world, you’re going to have some moments you would just as soon have lived through in private. 

But in the age of our great common internet living room, it’s kind of striking how that Greek chorus of disapproving curmudgeons stands ready to tell you clearly and absolutely that you’re dangerously overindulgent, criminally under involved, cruel in your adherence to traditions, or unconscionably cavalier in your willingness to let them go.

Parents today! Mothers today! If they would only put down their smartphones and pay attention to their children! If they would only stop spoiling them and giving in to them over everything!

The children are being dangerously ignored by their self-centered, screen-focused, me-generation parents. No, wait, the children are being dangerously coddled and attended to and overindulged and pampered by their incompetently anxious, hovering helicopter parents.

I admit I always wonder how anyone gets away with typing any of this stuff without feeling like a character actor playing a tight-lipped codger in a vintage movie, coming on screen for a few minutes to drip comic vinegar. But the world is apparently full of people waiting to draw themselves up and intone some version of “why, when I was a child…”

It is indeed part of my professional responsibility as a pediatrician — one on one, in the privacy of the exam room — to let parents know when they’re doing something that is inadvisable or downright dangerous. 

Take the Kool-Aid out of the baby’s bottle; it’s bad for the teeth. You don’t have to give your toddler junk food just because he points to it and cries. That’s a beautiful amulet, but it’s dangerous to put anything around a small child’s neck.

But when I have to give that advice, health advice, risk-and-danger advice, or setting-limits advice, I try to do it gently. I try to remember that most parents are doing their very best, sometimes in circumstances harsher than any I’ve ever had to face with my own kids.

I would like to suggest that everyone who has posted more than one comment in the last two years passing judgment on other parents learn to knit as soon as possible. Winter is coming, and we all need scarves. There are some really nice, easy patterns on Ravelry, and you can download many of them free — and then you can choose your yarn and put your heart into it and make something beautiful.

With luck, the people who see it in real life and the ones who admire it in the photos you post online will respect the effort you put into it, and offer praise and encouragement. And if they don’t have anything nice to say, they won’t say anything at all.



Nov. 29, 2022 My opinion: This part "It’s soothing and inspiring and relaxing and stimulating," reminds me of how you feel looking at Pinterest.

 Mar. 10, 2017 "Taking stock of toddler's tall tales": Today I found this article by Micah Toub in the Globe and Mail:


The first time I seriously thought about the lies between my toddler and me was around the time he turned 2. On that fateful day, I asked him if he’d had a poo, and he answered so promptly and with such an unusual certainty that I knew something was up. I smelled a lie.

Half a year later, it’s still his go-to fib. He never wants his play interrupted and so, according to his fake news, he never does a No. 2.

Not that he’s the only one lying. While he’s consistent with his, the untruths going the other way have run the gamut. The streetcars are broken so we can’t ride them. That cookie was the last one. And, yes, Daddy and Mommy are going to sleep now, too.

For a long time, I laughed off the mutual deception, but lately I’ve been wondering – and worrying – about our underlying motivations. 

Why the dishonesty, and was this going to continue forever? 

Research out of Dr. Kang Lee’s lab at the Ontario Institute for Studies in Education has shown that 30 per cent of two year olds will lie about a transgression. 

That goes up to half by the age of three, and then 80 per cent or more after the age of four. 

While I don’t have statistics to prove it, I’m fairly certain that by adulthood everyone lies – including to their kids. I’ve discovered, however, that my parental lies are more problematic than the ones my son tells me.

Toddlers’ lies are inspired by wishful thinking, says Ann Douglas, author of 14 parenting books, including last year’s Parenting Through the Storm. 

“If a parent asks, ‘Did you break this?’ and you wish you hadn’t, you’ll be tempted to say no,” she explained. Although a deceitful child can cause concern, these early lies should actually be celebrated.

“He has made a psychological breakthrough,” Douglas said of my son who never poos. “It means he now understands that other people have other ideas in their heads, so it’s possible for him to not tell the truth.” 

Dubbed “theory of mind” in the field of psychology, this cognitive milestone also means a child is on his way to building the ability to empathize. 

Lying becomes a red flag, says Douglas, if an older child who has learned the difference between truth and tall tales still lies about almost everything.

In her experience, Douglas says parental lies are motivated mostly by exhaustion, and “bridging the gap between what they want and what you can deliver.” 

When I asked around for these fictions, I discovered they are vast and, in some cases, incredibly creative. One of the more common stories is that the ice-cream truck plays music when it’s out of ice cream. One mom said she told her baseball-devoted toddler that Jose Bautista loves broccoli. And there was this amazing one: “I told my daughter McDonald’s is closed because ‘Old McDonald’ is old and tired of making French fries.”

While Douglas says parental lies are understandable, honesty is better in the long run. “Do you say, ‘No, we can’t go to the park because someone took all the slides away?’” asks Douglas. 

“Or, ‘We can’t go because Mom and Dad are exhausted, but we can do something else.’” The latter, she said, may result in disappointment, but the attendant tantrum is actually a hidden opportunity.

“Every time you help another person work through a difficult situation, it cements the bond between you. They can count on you to have their back.” 

If you go for the lie instead, it teaches the kid that this is a valid strategy for emotional regulation and getting through tough times.

After learning about this downside of dishonesty, I have tried to move toward a zero-lie policy.

 When I recently told my son that we’d be saving the rest of the cookies in the jar for later, I admit I was surprised that the world didn’t end. 

There was a series of whines, and an angry hand slammed onto the table, but the next day he was already trying out this new idea of waiting for something: “I’m saving that for later,” he told me about an apple slice one second before eating it.

The odd fib still slips through, though, and to be honest, seems harmless. Like, is it really so bad to tell my son, who has recently become obsessed with the Beatles, that John Lennon loves to eat the fish his Daddy makes him? I mean, the once-macrobiotic musician likely did when he was (cough) alive.

In any case, it doesn’t matter, because my toddler decided two could play at that game. “No,” he replied. “John Lennon does not like to eat fish.”

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/parenting/taking-stock-of-toddlers-tall-tales/article34176978/
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"5 Apps That Turn Your Phone Into a Document Scanner"/ "The Best Mobile Scanning Apps"

 Feb. 7, 2022: I went to the Edmonton Film Industry Facebook group:

I'm posting this here, because the news articles are about writing and filmmaking:
I want to scan all my news articles and save them onto a USB key.
Do you have a scanner that I can come over and use?
I went to the EPL once, and it took awhile to scan a few things and email it to myself or someone else.
I guess I could take a picture of every article, but it doesn't seem as efficient.
I have like a big box of news to scan.
What is the fastest and cheapest way to scan all this?
I would really appreciate it if there is one. Thank you.


Dave M posted this:

Mar. 31, 2021 "5 Apps That Turn Your Phone Into a Document Scanner":

Thanks to smartphones, it's easier than ever to digitize you various documents — such as bills, receipts, newspaper articles and even photos — so that you can access them whenever you want. 

All you have to do is open an app, point your camera at it and — snap — it's saved in the cloud.

Most scanner apps (as well as apps with dedicated scanner features) have built-in technologies that automatically cut, crop and (sometimes) color your scanned document so that it looks best. We've rounded up the best scanner apps that you can use right now. 

Which one you choose will depend largely on the services and apps you already use, as well as how you plan to use your documents after they are scanned.

Adobe Scan

Adobe Scan is one of the best scanner apps because of its simplicity and accuracy — it's also free. Adobe saves all these scans as PDFs, which might be a point of frustration for those who want to save as a JPEG so they can add to a Word document or PowerPoint presentation. 

Also, it saves all your scanned PDFs to its own cloud storage system, Adobe Document Cloud, and isn't the best if you use other cloud storage systems, like Google Drive or Dropbox. It's available on iOS and Android.

Price: Free

Apple Notes

If you're user of Apple's Notes app, the good news is that it has a built-in scanner feature that's super simple to use. All you to do is app the Notes app > select or create a note > tap the camera icon > select Scan Documents. Also, it's free.

Price: Free

Stack

Stack is a new scanner app for Android owners who use Google Drive. It's lets you to digitize your various documents, saving them as PDFs and then automatically uploading to Google Drive. It has some fairly straightforward organization tools, making it really simple and easy to use. There's no iOS app at this time, but that could change in the near future.

Price: Free

SwiftScan

If you're looking for a more powerful and feature-packed scanner app, SwiftScan might be your best bet. It has a number of organization and search tools, and allows you to save scanned documents as PDFs or JPEGs, making them more easily shared; additionally it works with most cloud services, including as iCloud, Dropbox, Google Drive. The downside is that, well, it can be expensive — especially if you have an iPhone. A subscription costs $6/month ($35 year) for iOS, while an Android subscription costs less than half that.

Price: $6/month+

Dropbox Scan App

In the middle of 2020, Dropbox introduced a new scanner feature to its iOS app — unfortunately, it's not yet available on its Android app yet — that allows you digitize your documents and photos and upload them right to your Dropbox. All you have to do open the Dropbox app > select the + icon > select Scan Document. The app allows you to save a file as a PDF or PNG.

Price: Free

The Best Scanner Apps for Your Smartphone (gearpatrol.com)


Jan. 25, 2021 "The Best Mobile Scanning Apps": Today I found this article by Ben Keough on the Wirecutter:


This may seem shocking, but unless you’re an accountant or archivist, you probably don’t need a traditional scanner—today’s smartphone scanning apps are simply that good. After spending more than 35 hours researching 20 scanning apps and testing seven of them, we’ve determined that our favorite is the lean and efficient Adobe Scan (for Android and iOS). It’s dead simple to use, capable of beautiful scan quality, and equipped with excellent text-recognition capabilities. Best of all, it’s totally free—even for iPhone owners.

Adobe Scan (for Android and iOS) is great at capturing the sort of documents life throws at you on a once-in-a-while basis—stuff like rebate forms, tax documents, and the occasional business card. 

It isn’t as complex or powerful as apps like CamScanner or our upgrade pick, SwiftScan, and it can export only PDFs. 

But its simplicity means it’s extremely easy to use, and its scans look even better than those from other top scanning apps. It automatically stores every scan you capture on Adobe Document Cloud, so your scans are accessible from any phone, tablet, or computer. And its useful dedicated scanning modes mean you can add new contacts from business cards and fill out forms right on your device.

If you like the sound of Adobe Scan’s simplicity but spend a lot of time working in the Microsoft Office suite, Microsoft Office Lens (Android and iOS) is the way to go. Its user interface is similarly stripped down, but the output options include Word documents and PowerPoint slides in addition to PDFs. Its scans don’t look as clean as what you can get from Adobe Scan or SwiftScan, and you may find its sharing options annoyingly limited. But its world-class text recognition almost makes up for those drawbacks.

SwiftScan (formerly ScanPro) (Android and iOS) is a more full-featured app than Adobe Scan or Office Lens, offering stuff like custom folders for better organization, smart file naming, iCloud syncing, and automatic uploading to your choice of more than a dozen cloud storage services. 

SwiftScan produces good-looking scans across a variety of document types, including books, business cards, and even photos. It can perform OCR in dozens of languages, and the results are very good, if not quite best in class. However, the iOS app relies on a relatively expensive subscription model, and the more affordable (non-subscription) Android app isn’t as fully developed as the iOS version (though it’s still more feature-rich than our other picks). Ultimately, we think SwiftScan makes sense only for people who really need the extra features.

The Best Mobile Scanning Apps for 2022 | Reviews by Wirecutter (nytimes.com

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