Friday, March 11, 2022

"LinkedIn is not a dating app: Why a professional networking site is causing women users such distress"/ "How to craft an effective respectful workplace policy"

I'm posting this article in in honor of International Women's Day (Mar.8). 


Jan. 21, 2021 "LinkedIn is not a dating app: Why a professional networking site is causing women users such distress": Today I found this article by Maighna Nanu on Yahoo:


When Regina Scott found out that, after a gruelling boot camp, she had received her dream internship at a software company, she was excited: her mid-pandemic career change into the tech industry had paid off.

Eager to share her success with friends and colleagues, she posted a photo of herself on LinkedIn with an inspirational caption hoping to motivate others.

“Changing your career is an incredibly stressful and challenging thing,” Scott said in an interview with Yahoo Lifestyle Canada. “So I wanted people to know that it is possible and I wanted to celebrate my achievement.”

Within minutes, the 25-year-old was inundated with messages; some congratulatory, some seeking career advice — but most were inappropriate messages from men commenting on her appearance.

Normally Scott would ignore these sorts of messages, but the sheer volume of them on a day when she was celebrating a professional milestone hit a nerve. So, when she received a message from a high-level employee at a major tech company commenting on her appearance, she decided to call him out on his behaviour.

When confronted, the man’s messages became increasingly aggressive. Scott said the man went so far as to threaten to report her to her employer as a “problematic employee.”

Scott was initially excited to receive a message from an employee from such a well known company, but was disheartened to see how he behaved.

“I thought it was pretty cool since I would love to make new connections with people in big tech companies and then he hit on me,” she recalled.

Unlike Instagram or Twitter, LinkedIn is strictly a professional networking site and is often used by companies to recruit qualified employees.

“It’s supposed to be agnostic of how you look and it’s supposed to be based on your achievements and your goals and aspirations,” Scott said. “This kind of behaviour from men is so toxic and disappointing.”

Scott is not alone in her frustration. Last month a post by Chandler Walker, a 22-year-old social media intern, condemning this behaviour went viral.

“I'm frustrated that I even have to write this post, but I feel like many women are experiencing the same thing,” Walker wrote in a post that has since received more than 25,000 likes.

 “LinkedIn is not a dating app — please do not connect or message me on LinkedIn — unless you want to network. I have worked my whole life to be taken seriously as a professional woman. An unwarranted personal message that has nothing to do with work — on a website that is specifically for professional networking — is unacceptable.”

Walker’s post received hundreds of comments from women echoing similar experiences of receiving unwanted and inappropriate messages from men.

"I’m so glad you posted this. I have felt the same way and was wondering if it was just me experiencing it,” wrote one user.

Others shared how men had purported to have job opportunities when they only wanted to hit on them.

“I was sick of it happening, because it really made me feel like a joke,” explained Walker, who said a message from a 50-year-old man calling her profile picture “really cute” was the final straw that lead her to write the post. "I had no idea who he was - we weren't even in the same state and I don't know how he came across me or anything like that. It truly felt like some weird Instagram direct message (DM)."

Harassment over LinkedIn an example of the blurring of boundaries, explains business psychologist Dr. Nic Hammarling.

“When LinkedIn was first created it was seen very much as a more formal way of managing and sharing your CV —now it has morphed to become more of a social platform,” Hammarling said. “That has blurred the boundaries in terms of how people are using it -so we do indeed see people reaching out on a much more personal basis, and that's where we're starting to get into some of the more dangerous territory."

Men have used the premise of LinkedIn to their advantage because women have their messages open. Women using the site are doing so in order to network to find employment, suggested Walker, who noted that the harassment has become more commonplace since the outbreak of COVID-19.

Walker said she is constantly surprised at how bold men are with their comments when contacting her on a professional site.

“I think it's weird because I can see them and I can see the name of their company and where they went to college — I can see that they are 40-years-older than me,” she said.

Scott agrees, and says she is shocked that men with such carefully curated profiles at large companies would be so irresponsible.

“For them to be messaging me like that I was shocked - like what are you doing you are risking all of this just to hit on someone?” she asked incredulously.

One of the principal reasons why people demonstrate inappropriate behaviour in a professional environment is fundamentally a lack of self insight, observes Hammarling.

“It’s almost as though they're missing that understanding of how this is likely to be perceived and how it plays out for people - that is a really big part of it, she explained.


 “It’s the equivalent of being in a physical meeting room, and then somebody asking you to make the tea because you are the women in the room - you are on a professional forum and somebody is reaching out to you because of your gender.

 It’s very reminiscent of some of the more obvious ways that we're seeing women feeling that they're being reduced to their gender rather than their experience and what they're bringing."

Both Scott and Walker agree with Hammarling and feel as though the purpose of LinkedIn is being missed and misused.

“They look at me like an object - an attractive girl in coding who’s fair game to hit on,” said Scott.

Ultimately, there is a feeling that there is little recourse for this sort of behaviour. Walker now blocks men who send her those types of messages saying the men aren’t worth the emotional labour. She also fears that if she calls them out on their inappropriate comments, then they may know someone in her professional circle.

“They might tell people not to hire me or get people to blacklist me - that’s a big fear,” she added.

Speaking out felt good as there was a solidarity in the comments said Walker, but she experienced backlash from people who thought she was just seeking attention.

“I think it needs to come to light to the people at LinkedIn to do something about it,” Scott said.

LinkedIn said the site is taking precautions to prevent harassment and have introduced new feature to report unwanted behaviour.

“We do not tolerate any form of harassment on LinkedIn and are always listening to feedback from our members to create a safe experience for everyone in our community. We recently strengthened our Professional Community Policies to be even clearer that harassment and romantic advances have no place on LinkedIn and the actions we take to protect members,” the statement read. 

“We’ve also added reminders for members to keep conversations professional in posts, comments, and messages. We continue to invest in keeping our members safe, including new features such as in-line warnings on messages that may include harassment, and encourage members to report any content they don’t feel comfortable with to us.”

Let us know what you think by commenting below and tweeting @YahooStyleCA! Follow us on Twitter and Instagram and sign up for our newsletter.

LinkedIn and dating: Why women are reporting inappropriate messages from men (yahoo.com)

My opinion: Now I hear my friend Angela saying this about Justin Berry doing sexual things on webcam for money:

Angela: Are people really this dumb?  By the time you get to this age (13) don't you kind of know what's right and wrong by then?  I think he knew what he was doing was kind of wrong, so I don't see him as 100% victim.

I'm saying this about the men who hit on the women on LinkedIn: This is a professional website, not a dating site.

I never got hit on or harassed on LinkedIn.


This also reminds me of my Aug. 2013 blog post: 

joke flops/ funny and annoying/ funny wedding video


Sexual harassment: I've mentioned this before.  This was the worst joke flops I have ever seen.  It was also in gr. 10 and this guy was pretending he was interested in my friend by saying disgusting and sexual things to her for 20 min.  He was suffering from delusions of grandeur that he thought was so funny, but no one else was, especially my friend.  He also suffered from low level of emotional intelligence because he couldn't see how offended my friend was.  It's not until she cried and walked out that he was like: "Oh my God, I totally offended her."

Tracy's blog: joke flops/ funny and annoying/ funny wedding video (badcb.blogspot.com)


Dec. 18, 2017 "How to craft an effective respectful workplace policy": Today I found this article by Bill Howatt in the Globe and Mail:

Chief research and development officer of work force productivity, Morneau Shepell, Toronto

Are respectful-workplace policies negatively impacting your employees' mental health?

On the surface, this question may not appear to be logical, considering that the spirit of a respectful-workplace policy is quite straight forward: to set the minimal standard for civil behaviour in the workplace with respect to bullying, discrimination and harassment. 

The primary objectives of a respectful-workplace policy are to define a standard, be a deterrent and provide guidance on how incivility is to be managed within the organization, from conflict resolution, investigations and discipline, up to termination.


In some provinces, occupational health and safety (OHS) legislation, such as Ontario bills C-168 and 132, holds employers accountable for not only putting respectful-workplace policies in place, but also for enforcing them.

The intention behind respectful-workplace policies and OHS legislation makes sense. 

However, the process to defend one's rights can have a negative effect on a victim's mental health because of unintended consequences.

Consider the example of Jill, who is being verbally abused and shamed by her direct manager. The manager constantly complains about the quality of her work and regularly threatens to fire her. As well, he makes lewd comments about her body image. The manager is calculated, and only makes these comments to Jill when they're alone.

The stresses of these interactions are taking a toll on Jill's mental health. She's a single mother with three small children and no other financial support. The day-to-day stress that Jill is under to take care of all the demands of her personal life and her job is challenging. 

With the additional stress of having an abusive manager, she feels as if she's going to break.

 Encouraged by two of her closest work friends to talk to the human resources department to have the abuse stop, Jill summons a brief burst of courage and meets with HR to make a complaint.

HR is professional and engages Jill in a difficult conversation in a caring and supporting manner, but she quickly learns how hard self-advocating can be.

HR asks Jill what she has done so far to stop the abuse

Jill has said nothing; she's too scared. This is where the unintended consequences begin. HR reminds Jill that the respectful-workplace policy recommends confronting unwanted behaviour immediately, to set a boundary. 

Although Jill was trained in the policy, at no point was she tested or trained to determine if she is capable of advocating for herself if threatened. Many of these policies are written through a legal lens and have little consideration for human behaviour. 

The HR professional trying to understand Jill's case through questioning concludes that Jill needs support and will require help. Jill starts to wonder whether she has done something wrong and becomes increasingly nervous.

HR asks if Jill wants to file a harassment complaint

Jill responds, "I think so, if that means HR can get this bullying and harassment to stop." As HR explains the process with respect to investigation and timeline, Jill's internal dialogue begins to run with many terrifying "what ifs." 

Another unintended consequence is the mental strain that the due diligence and investigation processes can have on the victim's mental health. Not everyone has the resiliency and resolve to confront a harasser or to defend themselves. 

Within 20 minutes, Jill believes she may have made a mistake and is thinking about how to get this conversation to stop. Her level of fear from doing what her two colleagues suggested has resulted in her becoming terrified of what could happen if she's not believed. 

The HR person is supportive, but determines that a process that could take up to two months to fully investigate and end this matter is too overwhelming for Jill to process. They suggest that there are things they can do to create space between Jill and her manager.

At this point, a percentage of people such as Jill will proceed, while others may withdraw because of the perceived stress and fear. 

In cases such as Jill's, without a complainant's testimony, it's difficult for an employer to act because the process that's designed to protect both victim and accused requires evidence to make a decision. 

The goal of a well-written and well-implemented respectful-workplace policy is to create a fair and level playing field that facilitates social justice.

What an employer can do to reduce the negative impact a workplace policy has on employees' mental health

When designing a respectful-workplace policy and training, consider the competencies and support systems that can support potential victims to self-advocate. Such training would include elements of resiliency and coping skills that are designed to assist employees to prepare and develop foundation skills for self-advocating.

In the policy design, provide clarity on how to prevent and react to boundary violations, misunderstandings and unresolved conflict. 

These can be dealt with using a design where the focus is on learning, reconciliation and resolution. This can help prevent winners and losers, which often results from a situation that's not dealt with early and goes to an investigation.

When creating respectful-workplace training for employees, use situational learning, which can help them practice self-advocating, so that they can understand what they can do if they are a victim or are falsely accused. 

Make the goal of training promoting psychological safety and growth, rather than just checking an administrative checkbox.

https://www.theglobeandmail.com/report-on-business/careers/leadership-lab/how-to-craft-an-effective-respectful-workplace-policy/article37326865/

rschwindt
3 days ago

This article makes some good points - and ones that are rarely made - but does not go far enough. In many workplace cultures there is no point in drafting a policy at all. It will only act against the target. Peter Drucker famously said:

"Culture eats policy for breakfast every day of the week."

If someone is being harassed in most organizations the opposition to that individual will usually coalesce and form something resembling a mob that won't stop until that person breaks down or leaves. This become a form of addictive corporate behavior. HR is useless in these situations and typically part of the problem.

Change will only come in the form of a cultural change emanating from the executive suite. And the will to do that is rarely present.

I do have some bona fides in this area



This is from my Mar. 2021 blog post:

"#MeToo movement becomes #WeToo in in victim-blaming Japan"/ "Outrage as women in Japan told not wear glasses in the workplace"


Aug. 17, 2020 Saying: I found this on Facebook:

"You never look good when you are trying to make someone else look bad."- Unknown

Cham: Sometimes people need to be exposed for who they are hahah or maybe I should stop being petty

Tracy Au: There's a difference between trying to make someone look bad, and exposing them for who they are. It's like those #MeToo accusers and victims, they are plainly telling everybody about the perpetrators. They're not trying to make them look bad.






This week's theme is about sexual harassment and assault in the workplace:

"What can I do to make my building's parking garage safe?"/ "My boss hired a man who assaulted me. Should I disclose this?"



"Riot Games settles class-action gender discrimination lawsuit for $100 million"/ "Amazon worker records alleged sexual harassment she encounters in every shift




My week:


Jan. 29, 2022 Tracy being too fixated on things: This was in 2012.

Tracy:  Am I intense?
Angela: You are too fixated on things like the girl who is in a religion that doesn't allow her to talk to boys.
Tracy: And Dateline: To Catch a Predator.

However, if you read the blog from 2011-2012, one blog post is about jobs and careers, and one blog post is about TV, movies, and writing, and one blog post is about like news or shopping.

I am writing topics on my priorities like an office career and a TV writer and producer career. 

Ever since Sept. 2014, I have been copying and pasting news articles on my blog.


Mar. 5, 2022: I'm writing this now to ask: If you look at my blogs and Facebook's page, does it look like I'm fixated on things?

I may look like I am fixated on job articles, but I read this like 5 days a week and I like a lot of articles so I post them here.


Mar. 4, 2022 "'Legendary' Ukrainian resourcefulness inspires Canadian vodka CEO into action": Today I found this article by Joe O'Connor on the Financial Post:

Canadian entrepreneur is donating 100 per cent of her profits to humanitarian aid in Ukraine:

Canadian entrepreneur Katherine Vellinga was bumping through the streets of a Ukrainian city in a relative’s Lada when the vehicle sputtered to a stop.


"Supporting female entrepreneurs in Canada": Today I found this article by Nadia Moharib on the Financial Post:


And the ones we are about to share are all women in honour of International Women’s Day which falls on Tuesday, March 8, 2022. Here’s to ladies everywhere making things happen, women supporting women and to everyone who does anything to join the push for equality for women wherever they may be in the world. 

Keep up the good work

Numbers from spring 2021 show these women are in good company with more than 360,000 self-employed women in Canada — a hike of about 30 per cent over the last decade.

These success stories not only serve as templates for others wanting to pursue their own business ventures but research shows boosting the number of women entrepreneurs translates into an estimated potential $150 billion GDP economic gain.

“While only about a third of Canadian small businesses are owned by women, female entrepreneurs now make up half of start-ups,” Dan Kelly, Canadian Federation of Independent Business president told us. “The rate of growth among women business owners is really encouraging, but Canada can do much better. There are significant obstacles in banking and finance which need to end. And while starting a small business may not be impossible, there remain too many challenges for women in growing and scaling their businesses. Technology can be a great enabler and the trend lines remain positive.”

Show your support

Of course, this is just a small list of women-owned small businesses operating coast-to-coast but we are pretty sure you’ll be impressed by what they have to offer. 

Supporting female entrepreneurs in Canada  | Financial Post

There is one comment:

Canada has lost site of what an entrepreneur, male or female, is, but one thing for sure is that throwing government money at an individual and calling that person an entrepreneur is a laughable fallacy.


Mar. 9, 2022 True Colors Personality test: I'm cleaning my office and I have this from the Arts and Cultural Management program back in 2005.


I was 20 yrs old back then and I and the majority of the class was the color Blue.


I was 27 yrs old and in 2013, at the Office Job we did that quiz.  I was a Green.  Most of the class was Orange. 






Mar. 9, 2022 "Canadian companies eye Ukrainian tech workers amid Russian invasion": Today I found this article by Tara Deschamps on BNN Bloomberg news.  

When Russia started waging war against Ukraine last month, Vancouver recruiter VanHack was so anxious to help that it immediately created a directory of Ukrainian tech workers willing and eager to relocate for a job or to work remotely.

The company waived or offered to donate the placement fees for Ukrainian hires to charities and had 226 companies in less than two weeks that were interested in learning how they could bring in Ukrainian tech workers and at least a dozen doing interviews.

"It's been overwhelming," said VanHack founder and chief executive Ilya Brotzky, who was born in Russia and often visited his late grandfather in Ukraine.

"I've honestly never seen anything like it. It's just so much outpouring and support. It's been really encouraging."

VanHack, which helped two Ukrainian workers find jobs in Canada in the days leading up to the Russian invasion, was not the only company with its eye on Ukrainian tech workers.

Canadian companies eye Ukrainian tech workers amid Russian invasion - BNN Bloomberg


Table Topics: The first week of March, I attended 4 of these online events.

Friends: The first week of March, I called my friend Sherry to check on her because last time she was sick.  She's fine now.

I called my friend Dan L. and we chatted for 25 min.

I asked them both the questions: If you had 5 years left to live, what would you do?

Both said spend more time with family and friends.  Aww...

The Simpsons: My friend Cham came over and we watched my DVR recordings:


"Mothers and Other Strangers":

"In a flashback to his teen years, Homer goes on a road trip with his father to search for his mother."


"Pixelated and Afraid":

"Homer and Marge must push themselves to their limits when they get lost in an icy wilderness."



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