This article is about dating. You may be angry, depressed, and in a bad mood after reading this:
I Purposely Dumbed Myself Down To See If It Attracted More Men
Oct. 28, 2018 Ricky Martin and celebs donate to Puerto Rico:
Oct. 1, 2016 Bad dating:
I Purposely Dumbed Myself Down To See If It Attracted More Men
I also noticed that before, my dates would usually offer to meet over coffee but now men suddenly wanted to take me out for drinks and were quite insistent that alcohol be involved in our dates.
In person I bit my tongue, smiled and said “ohmygodwowthatissoamazing” way too much. I feigned ignorance on current events, culture, and pretty much everything, and what I realized was that the men I was dating seemed to get off on “teaching” a woman, showing her the ways of the world, and exposing her to supposedly new things, thus creating a dynamic where the man is in a superior position and the woman is clearly subordinate and relying on the man for guidance and information.
Except, no. Not to mention, three-quarters of these dudes had no idea what they were even talking about. Plus, they all seemed intent on getting me drunk, which wasn’t happening because I was too smart for that.
Bizarrely, several of them outright asked me if I’d had cosmetic surgery and if I’d be willing to go under the knife (uh, no). Oh, and they were still trying to get me drunk, which a male friend explained to me was because they were trying to get a fast-pass to sex.
Mission immediately aborted.
It’s not that men like dumb women. What’s actually going on here is that a large percentage of men want to have a good time with a woman (which includes sex) without having to do a lot of work. These guys aren’t looking for wives. They want a woman on their own terms and they want her superficially, so they can use her as an object to feel better about themselves.
It’s less about intelligence than it is about disposability. Plus, they don’t want their egos challenged. Good riddance to them. Sure, I could get a lot more dates if I dumbed myself down, but they sure weren’t with quality men, so what was the point?
Shaq Hoque 18 minutes ago
Plus, they all seemed intent on getting me drunk, which wasn’t happening because I was too smart for that.
This comment right here tells me you're the problem. There are plenty of smart women out there, and they are in healthy relationships. The fact that you dwell so much on the dynamics of superiority tells me you're oblivious to that fact about your own behaviour.
Maybe take a step back and assess how you come across yourself. There's a fine line between being funny and annoying. The same can be said for smartness.
Maybe take a step back and assess how you come across yourself. There's a fine line between being funny and annoying. The same can be said for smartness.
Alion 33 minutes ago
Yeah, all those guys dumped her because they were insecure. Sure. Just like my next door neighbors' kids had no friends growing up because all the other kids were jealous of their intelligence. Never mind that while it's true that while they were smart they were also obnoxious brats from an early age.
It's personality that people of both genders often find important when dating, not just looks or intelligence. If you're rude, or arrogant, or just an insufferable know-it-all you will have trouble sustaining a long term relationship unless you find someone similar.
The writer of this article is doubtless very intelligent but I suspect the extent of her self-love was a bit much for most of the guys she went out with.
The writer of this article is doubtless very intelligent but I suspect the extent of her self-love was a bit much for most of the guys she went out with.
PATRICK2 hours ago
As in nature, so in human attraction: it is the woman who chooses the man, not the other way round. All you women who complain about lousy men; why are you attracting so many duds?
Find out what you desire and need in a man and don't settle for less. Look for him and be patient.
Nothing attracts losers like neediness and desperation. Conversely, nothing will repel your ideal partner, than impatience. There are lots of good men out there, smart men who want a smart woman, but if you keep dating the dolts, you'll never meet them.
Sept. 23, 2017 "Why are good men so hard to find?": Today I found this article by Margaret Wente in the Globe and Mail:
Find out what you desire and need in a man and don't settle for less. Look for him and be patient.
Nothing attracts losers like neediness and desperation. Conversely, nothing will repel your ideal partner, than impatience. There are lots of good men out there, smart men who want a smart woman, but if you keep dating the dolts, you'll never meet them.
Sept. 23, 2017 "Why are good men so hard to find?": Today I found this article by Margaret Wente in the Globe and Mail:
Spend a little time with single women in their early to mid-30s, and you'll be grateful you're not one of them. The relationship scene is even more dismal today than when I was their age. All the women want serious relationships that lead to marriage, but many of the men they meet do not. All too often a woman moves in with some guy, hoping they're on the road to somewhere. Two years later, he tells her he's not ready for marriage and kids just yet. Splat.
But wait. Hasn't online dating made the mating market easier? Yes – for men. If you really want to hear a woman rant, just utter the word Tinder.
Single women are more equal and empowered than ever before. They have unparalleled sexual, reproductive and economic autonomy. In many ways, they're doing much better than the men. (Just look at the lopsided university graduation rates, which are now around 60-40). And yet, large numbers of young women admit their private lives are a sad mess.
If you're a gender studies major, stop reading here. You're going to hate what I've got to say next. I don't like it much myself.
In a nutshell, over the past few decades, the traditional relationship exchange has broken down. It used to be that men and women each had something the other really needed. Men needed access to sex. Women needed access to resources. Men couldn't get steady access to sex unless they had resources to offer, so they worked hard for them. The partnership between men and women was a grand bargain that (usually) left both sides better off.
For men, sex was traditionally expensive. The price tag was a long-term commitment to provide for a woman (and children). But today, sex is cheap. And that changes everything.
This is the premise of a bracing new book, Cheap Sex, by American sociologist Mark Regnerus. Sex got cheap because of three technological developments: the advent of the Pill, which divorced fertility from sex; the onset of mass-produced, high-quality pornography; and the arrival of online dating sites, which make it easy for men to find willing sex partners.
Sexual liberation is a fabulous thing – in some ways. But it can also turn men into louts, because women don't expect much in return for access. Today, most men can have all the sex they want for very little cost – no fancy dinner required. The irony, as Mr. Regnerus writes, is that today's mating market is probably more dominated by men's interests than ever before.
When women complain that marriageable men (sober, steady good providers) are harder to find than ever, they may well be right. The marriage rate is falling steadily, especially among the lower middle class, while long-term stable marriage is increasingly a privilege reserved for the better off.
A lot of women seem to have their act together these days. But a lot of men don't. "I think the greatest, most astonishing fact that I am aware of in social science right now is that women have been able to hear the labour market screaming out 'You need more education'… and men have not," MIT economics professor Michael Greenstone says in Cheap Sex.
What might explain this puzzling fact? Men don't have to prove themselves as providers any more. They can get all the sex they want anyway – including online porn on demand that can make the real thing feel mildly disappointing. (Ask younger women about men and porn. You'll get an earful.)
Like it or not, women have always been the gatekeepers for sex – not because they don't like sex, too, but because (no matter what you learned in gender studies) men's sex drive is innately higher. This means it's up to us to make the rules. "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" my father used to say. It drove me crazy when he said that. Now, it's dawned on me that he was right.
Since the women's cartel collapsed, women's bargaining power has seriously eroded. That's why so many single women hate Tinder, which has further commodified sex for the benefit of men. Women are just another consumer good in the shop window.
It may take a village to raise a child. But it takes a village to raise a husband, too. And modern society has largely abdicated from the job. "Good husband material doesn't occur naturally, but is instead the product (in part) of socialization, development, and social control," Mr. Regnerus writes. "[I]n the domain of sex and relationships men will act as nobly as women collectively demand."
Time to get our act together, ladies. If we don't, they won't either.
There are 191 comments already.
Oct. 26, 2017 'This is why men won't ask me out anymore':
https://ca.style.yahoo.com/men-wont-ask-anymore-161441776.html
My week:
Oct. 26, 2017 'This is why men won't ask me out anymore':
“When I lived in Hollywood, men would literally chase me down the street just to speak with me…I’d get asked out at the supermarket, at the gym, in the Uber car pool, and even once while I was behind the barrier of a police standoff (yes, really).”
My opinion: lol.
My opinion: lol.
After racking her brain trying to figure out the sudden shift in her romantic prospects, Glover finally reached out to a male friend for some answers, and his response has us fuming.
“Well,” The anonymous male friend began, “people are more confident hollering at fat chicks. They feel there is less chance of rejection so they are more bold.”
While there are several problems with the term, “hollering at fat chicks” the main takeaway from his honest and poorly worded explanation is that men continue to use the “fat chicks are easy” myth to protect their fragile male ego.
“These guys think I won’t automatically say yes so they’re not even bothering to approach me,” said Glover, rightfully rejecting the idea that plus-size women have low self-esteem, are grateful for male attention and therefore more likely to accept sexual advances.
Derek
3 hours ago
"...men continue to use the “fat chicks are easy” myth to protect their fragile male ego."
Can you imagine if I wrote such a thing about female egos in a published article? I'd be ripped apart! Newsflash: no one likes being rejected, man or woman. I'm pretty sure in this day and age men are still doing more asking than women are. So why aren't women asking men out? Must be their fragile female egos that can't take rejection. Offensive statement, isn't it?
Can you imagine if I wrote such a thing about female egos in a published article? I'd be ripped apart! Newsflash: no one likes being rejected, man or woman. I'm pretty sure in this day and age men are still doing more asking than women are. So why aren't women asking men out? Must be their fragile female egos that can't take rejection. Offensive statement, isn't it?
A
Allen
3 hours ago
Most overweight women I know want to date guys that are slim and in good shape yet they aren't! Just doesn't make sense to me. Would she date a guy as overweight as she is?
N
Not impressed
3 hours ago
Really would she go out with a whale of a guy? I doubt it
https://ca.style.yahoo.com/men-wont-ask-anymore-161441776.html
My week:
After hurricanes tore through Texas, Florida and many Caribbean islands and an earthquake shook Mexico, celebrities from all industries have been declaring their support for those affected. You can now add Ricky Martin and Beyonce to that growing list.
Earlier this week, Martin, a Puerto Rico native, appeared on “Ellen” to describe the horrible conditions many Puerto Ricans are facing following Hurricane Maria and to ask people to help the island.
“We were destroyed by a hurricane and it’s been very difficult,” Martin said on the show. “Right now, there is no water, there is no electricity, there is no food. There is no medicine. There is no diesel for the generators that will make the hospital work. People are dying. So, as a Puerto Rican, as the American that I am, I’m here to ask for your help.”
Ellen DeGeneres handed Martin an $80,000 check from Cheerios and General Mills to donate to Martin’s relief fund for Puerto Rico.
https://www.gaystarnews.com/article/gaga-ricky-martin-and-ellen-among-celebrities-donating-millions-to-puerto-rico/#gs.vJdfr44
Oct. 29, 2018 Productive: Today it was productive.
1. I went to Staples and recycled 7 pens and markers.
2. I walked to London Drugs and bought a bus pass.
3. I went and applied to get my passport. If you go to the Photo Stop at Canada Place to get your passport photos, it's $15.75.
If you go to Wal-Mart, it's $7 something.
Oct. 30, 2018 Soy and Pepper closed down: I was on the bus and saw it:
I went to a job interview there in 2017.
Oct. 31, 2018 Life coach exercise: I watched a lot of that TV show called Starting Over back in 2017 on the One network.
There are assignments for the women like for Antonia who is struggling with debt. Her assignment is to learn how to budget by decorating the guest room in the house.
She has to know how much this furniture and paint costs. It has to be max this amount.
Get a passport: I feel like getting that passport was a life coach exercise. I have never applied for one. The last time I went out of the country was in Spring break 1998. My parents were the ones who filled out the applications when we all went to Disneyland and Universal Studios.
I had to get a guarantor (my dad) to sign and two of my friends to be my references.
I had to get passport photos.
The goal is to get a passport. There are certain steps to get the passport.
I can research places I want to travel to, but I have to apply for a passport first.
Get a job: In order to get a job:
Write a resume.
Go on the internet and look for places that are hiring.
Pass out or send your resume on the internet.
Network and tell your friends, family, co-workers, classmates that you are looking for a job.
Read the business section of the newspaper.
Talk to career or guidance counselor if you want to.
Nicholas Winton: Today I found this on Linked In. It was a video:
Sir Nicholas George Winton MBE (born Wertheim; 19 May 1909 – 1 July 2015) was a British humanitarian who organised the rescue of 669 children, most of them Jewish, from Czechoslovakia on the eve of World War II in an operation later known as the Czech Kindertransport (German for "children's transport"). Winton found homes for the children and arranged for their safe passage to Britain.[2] The world found out about his work over 50 years later, in 1988. The British press dubbed him the "British Schindler".[3]
In 2003, Winton was knighted by Queen Elizabeth II for "services to humanity, in saving Jewish children from Nazi Germany occupied Czechoslovakia".[4] On 28 October 2014, he was awarded the highest honour of the Czech Republic, the Order of the White Lion (1st class), by Czech President Miloš Zeman.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nicholas_Winton
Two Bits Writing Advice to Writers from Writers: I joined this Linked In group back in 2011. I have a folder in my email account and decided to check it out. I haven't looked at in years.
The group is still here.
https://www.linkedin.com/groups/1820687/
Nov. 1, 2018: Now I'm checking out my Linked In connections to see if they joined groups.
On Facebook, there are groups too. I'm with the Edmonton Filmmakers Group.
Halloween: There were only 3 trick-or-treaters. We gave these small bags of chips from Wal-Mart. They were regular potato chips, but they tasted good.
Saturn car company: I was reading a book and it mentions this company. I looked it up:
Following the withdrawal of a bid by Penske Automotive to acquire Saturn in September 2009, General Motors discontinued the Saturn brand and ended its outstanding franchises on October 31, 2010.[3][4] All new production was halted on October 7, 2009.[5]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saturn_Corporation
Nov. 3, 2018 Mindset and Manifestation YEG Meetup: Today I went to a new Meetup group that I have never been to before. It's like those self-development videos I listen to:
"If you keep doing what you have always been doing, you will keep getting what you're getting."
I was there from 1pm to 2:40pm. It was average. I feel good that I went there and met 3 new people.
The highlights of the week:
1. I finished filing for my passport.
2. I went to 1 job interview this week.
3. I went to the new Meetup.
4. Work was fine.
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