Sept. 25 Post Secret:
There's a picture of the restaurant Olive Garden: "From the start of a meal...I give fat people extra bread sticks. It will save me a trip later on."
Me: It's kind of mean, but it's the plain truth. Of course you won't exactly say that to the customer, but you would think that or say it to the other servers.
"The only reason I became a sign language interpreter was for the attention."
Me: Well at least you're doing something good for positive attention.
There's a pic of a police notebook: "I wish I knew how to forgive myself for ruining the career I worked so hard for."
Me: Get counseling. This would be used for a police drama or any other drama. I've seen it on Rookie Blue and The Mentalist where someone has to lie for their co-worker to keep his job and/or his co-worker's job.
"I told my husband I was mugged while on a business trip to NYC so I could file the insurance claim on my engagement ring and get one that I actually like! It worked!"
Me: This sounds like a fun secret. Something to tell your friends. It's like a scheming story that I would see on Desperate Housewives.
"I was beautiful before the drugs."
Me: That reminds me of crystal meth. I saw it on Oprah about pictures before and after on how the drug affects you.
"I think people are more concerned with what happen with 9/11 ten years ago than what's happening now!"
Me: Let's focus on the present.
Sept. 27 Parks and Recreation: I saw the season premiere last week and it was funny and stupid. This guy sent a picture of his privates to the women in the municipal govt. office. This black guy news reporter Berd shows up again to interview Leslie Knope (Amy Poehler) about it.
Berd: How big of a deal is this?
Leslie: It's not that a big of deal, if you know what I mean.
Berd: I don't, but it has a cadence of a joke.
Cadence means the rhythm in speech. I looked it up. I thought it was a good joke. My sister loves this show and she said that Berd is a real news reporter.
Mystery: It was very stupid because the mystery was solved really fast. It's a sitcom so the story has to move faster because there's only 30 min to tell a story unlike a drama where it takes an hr to solve a mystery. The guy who sent the photos was caught, because he sent it from his personal email address stinkmaster69@sarah.lawrence.edu.
Lots of people know his email address and he told everybody what college he went to. If he didn't want to get caught, he should have created a fake email address that he will only use once and has nothing to link him. Don't use stinkmaster69@yahoo.com, use something like calender1743@yahoo.com. Use a random word and numbers, and send it from some public library computer. It's harder to get caught.
Maybe the govt. will hire some IT Tech worker and be able to trace it back, I don't know. But you got to say my idea is not as stupid as on the one on the show. lol.
Headlines:
"Woman tries to stick it to gum maker": I got this from 24 and there's a typo "trys to", so I corrected it here. An Edmonton woman Elsie C. Pawlow launched a $100,000 lawsuit against Kraft Canada. She says the gum falls apart into little pieces and gets stuck in her dentures. She filed the claim that cost $200, because she had to dig out the pieces of gum in her dentures which was "disgusting." She suffered depression for about 10min.
That's stupid, and the case will probably be thrown out of court. Do you remember The Simpsons where Lisa becomes President of the US? Bart was saying he was suing a company for giving him over salted fries. What the woman should have done is create a blog and diss the product or write a letter complaining to the company, and she may get a refund.
"Animal- rights group starts porn site": I got this from the Edmonton Journal, and Jay Leno did a joke about it last night. PETA will create a site called peta.xxx. The viewers will also learn about the cruelty to animals.
Sept. 28: This is from the Edmonton Journal's Sunday Reader.
"Method in the milk": According to A&A Economic Digest, a theater group performs in front of cows in England. The milk production is then increased by 4%.
"Bugging out": According to Denver Post, firefighters came to a house fire. There were swarms of bed bugs and were on the firefighters' uniforms and equipment. The men had to be decontaminated afterwards.
Baggy pants: According to the St. Paul Pioneer Press, a suspect was running and his pants fell down to his ankles. He put his hands up and a cop pulls up the guy's pants and found the gun. The suspect was sentenced to 5 yrs in prison for illegally possessing a fire arm.
The man's lawyer said the discovery of the gun was an illegal search. The Minnesota Court of Appeals said the office pulled the pants to conceal, not to reveal.
Elmo: According to Orlando Sentinal, Jeramie Trespalacios dressed up like Elmo. He went to kids birthday party in a Winter Park strip mall. On break, he went to the store Guitar Centre. A man came and attacked the Elmo costumed character.
"Elmo may not have started this fight- he never would- but he sure did finish it." The attacker was subdued and had a few broken fingers. He was arrested. No kids saw the attack.
"It looks good for the kids, though," said Trespalacios. "Elmo is kicking butt, keeping society good." lol.
"Wisdom of Elmo": There was this quote underneath the article. "When you judge somebody it's like throwing a boomerang- goes in a circle and comes back to the one throws it. Love is like that, too. Always comes back." -Elmo.
Blog videos:
Nigel Marsh: I was listening to one of my blog videos where Nigel Marsh talks about "How to Make work life balance." He talks about how the little things we do can make a big difference. He talks about how he picked up his son from school and they went to the playground, ate a pizza, and then read to him before bed. His kid tells him that today was the best day of his life.
NM: I didn't take him to Disney World or anything. I just spent time and had fun with him. The little things we do can keep our relationships together.
I agree. I wish I could spend time with my friends. I rarely ever talk to them on the phone, and even more rare do I see them. So that's why I send three emails a week to them.
Arianna Huffington: This is only 4 min. long. "How to Succeed? Get more Sleep." It was simple. If you get more sleep, you are more well- rested and can function and be more productive. She talked about how she was so tired, her head full on the desk and she had to get stitches. She tells women to sleep more: "You can literally sleep your way to the top." lol.
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