Nov. 26 Funny sketch: This is the fun email. I have to go through my old notes to really find funny things to write about.
This sketch was on Jay Leno in Dec. 2010, but I'm writing about it now.
Cut to JL, 3 men and a woman sitting at a table with a laptop. They're discussing budget cuts so they can still get their bonuses.
The lights go off and it comes back on. The laptop is missing.
JL: I'm going to turn off the lights and I will turn it back on, and the laptop will be put back.
The lights go off and on.
The laptop is there, but the table is missing.
JL turns the lights off then on.
The table and laptop is there, and the chairs are gone.
The lights go off and on.
Everything's there.
JL: Is anything missing?
Woman: Yeah, my breast implants.
Me: What?
The lights go off then on.
JL has the breast implants.
The lights go and on and it keeps getting crazier.
At the end there's a dinosaur outside, and a man gets eaten.
Then everything goes back to normal.
JL: Well now that one of us is gone, we can all get our bonuses.
lol.
Time machine: This was a sketch on Jay Leno, but on Jan. 27, 2011. This 20- something yr old guy named Trevor was on. He had a shaved head, athletic, kind of cute in an average way. He has a time machine and this is what happens when he goes back in time. I have seen on The Twilight Zone where a man goes back in time to prevent tragedies from happening like killing Hitler, but is unable to. To the sketch:
Cut to the moon landing where Neil Armstrong keeps messing up his line like a blooper.
NA: One small step for... what's the line? I mean, one small step for mankind and....
I thought the sketch improves when Trevor overhears Marilyn Monroe being dumped by John F. Kennedy over the phone.
T: She's very upset and vulnerable, and I shouldn't take advantage of that.
Cut to T in bed with MM, and he's smoking a cigarette. You know they slept together.
Then T starts using the time machine to sleep with famous women like Amelia Earhart.
Cut to T with Pocahontas.
P: I'm 14.
T runs.
T: This was a mistake.
T wakes up with a man.
I guess with both sketches, the premise has to be funny, and then make it funnier by layering the jokes.
Happy meal: This was from Oct. 2010 on Jay Leno. It was real. An artist takes a picture of a Happy meal he bought from McDonald's. He takes a picture everyday from day 1 to day 171. After 6 months, I thought the food was going to decompose. It didn't decompose. It stayed exactly the same.
Camera pan up to JL picking up the burger and eating it. lol.
Funny dance: Janet Jackson was on Larry King Live last year. I remember seeing a clip where JJ teaches LK a dance move from her "Feedback" music video." Here it is. It's kind of funny to see a big pop star teach a 70 yr old guy to do a small hip hop move.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8Zgc-TFOT8
Nov. 27 Light jokes: I was reading my old notes about TV shows.
Gossip Girl: I was watching Gossip Girl last season and a girl talks about getting into a sorority.
Girl: My mom said I wouldn't get in unless I lost 10 pounds. She's a bitch.
lol. Don't let put downs affect you.
Castle: I was watching Castle ep "Anatomy of a Murder." They have to solve a case and the question is: "If you were to meet your lover 3 yrs later, where do you go?"
Castle and me (unison): A motel.
lol. Actually they went somewhere else.
Republic Doyle: This was from last season. This show is about a man and his dad having a private investigation agency in Newfoundland. Allan Hawco plays Jake and I'm Facebook friends with him. lol. Jake Doyle has to solve a case and went undercover for a bit. He sees the mailman and recognizes him. Jake takes off his clothes in the middle of the street and runs to the door of a house. He wants to make himself look like he woke up and came out of the hosue.
Jake: Hi, I'm here to pick up the mail.
Mailman hands it to him and leaves.
An old senior woman opens the door and sees Jake in his underwear.
I predicted that it was going to be an old woman. There was another scene where Jake meets a woman at a bar and it seems like she's a prostitute. I predicted she wasn't going to be one. I was right, she works for the govt. I have to say this: Allan Hawco is fit and has good abs.
Another thing I have written down is a line that was said to the dad who had a heart attack: "You have a second chance at life."
There's going to be a new season on CBC in Jan. 2012. It's a fun comedy/ action show. Check it out.
Dark joke: In Oct. 2010, I had wrote down I was listening to 91.7 The Bounce radio station. This DJ volunteered to read a book kids. It was called The Last Invisible Boy. The DJ didn't research or read the book prior to it. It was actually about death and dealing with grief. The DJ talked about how he regretted not researching the book prior to it, and how he should have picked a lighter book.
Here are some reviews on Amazon. Most are good:
http://www.amazon.ca/Last-Invisible-Boy-Evan-Kuhlman/dp/1416957979
Commercial: There are some funny and quirky commercials I like. Cut to a man singing about love. Then a woman singing another line. Then a son and daughter. It turns out they're singing about finding things in an organized home. It's for Ikea.
Reversal of situations: I was watching South Park and the ep was called "Poor and Stupid." Cartman was crying about how he wasn't going to be able to achieve his dream of being a Nascar driver. It's because he isn't poor and stupid enough to be one. Usually it's supposed to be: "I'm not rich or smart enough to get into university."
It was kind of funny. They made fun of Nascar and the Nascar driver Danica Patrick. You may know her in those Go Daddy commercials. I did like the part where Butters donates blankets and canned foods to poor people. I like to see charity work.
Canadian male actors: I've been procrastinating about writing my post for my The Vertex Fighter blog. I have to write a post. This should get my creative juices flowing. These are the following Canadian male actors I see in it. What I have learned, is that Canadian actors go on Canadian shows.
I can see Gabriel Hogan as a bad guy. I've seen him play good guys on Heartland, Flashpoint, and The Best Years. He was a bad guy on The Bridge. I think because he's 38, he can play one of the older bad guys. Here's his pic:
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0389527/
The older brother role is supposed to be smart and mature. I've said I would give to Giles Panton (Flash Gordon) as my first choice. Now I think Craig Olejnik (star of The Listener) can play him. CO plays a good guy paramedic so I can naturally see him as the brother.
I can see Travis Milne (Chris Diaz from Rookie Blue) in it because he plays a good guy cop.
I can see my favorite Edmonton actor Eric Johnson (Rookie Blue) play the older brother, but also a bad guy too. He often plays bad guys like Whitney from Smallville.
There's Danijel Mandic, who was on Flashpoint. He's a good actor in the episode "Between Heartbeats", playing a guy who takes revenge on the SRU team. I can see him as a fighter. I also see Kerry James from Heartland as a fighter.
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