Jul. 24 Post Secret: Here a couple postcards:
"I'm 61, been jobless for a year, and I buy a lottery ticket each week to keep from killing myself."
"I think I need pills to save my marriage and family."
Sometimes you need these little things to get us through the day.
Job search: I took 2 days off from my job search when I was on vacation. It took me 4 days to get back up to speed.
Crazy trigger: I was reading the National Post and this guy was going to live tapings of TV shows like Saturday Night Live. I read the one where he went to see the Maury show. I haven't watched that show in 5 yrs, but I had to read about the experience. The writer had to sign a contract to say that he wasn't drunk before he got on the bus to be driven to the studio. lol. Seriously.
Maury wasn't there, but there was a guest host. It's not shot in NYC, it's shot in Stamford, Conneticut.
That totally triggered my memory of The Baby- Sitter's Club books by Ann M. Martin when I read them when I was a kid. The book series is about a group of 11-13 yr old girls who are in a club that is like a business. They give their baby- sitting services around their fictional town Stoneybrook, Conneticut. They sometimes travel to Stamford. lol.
Jul. 25 Rant: This morning I got into a fight with my sister. I'm going to write this in script format and you tell me who's wrong or more wrong.
S: Why didn't you open the blinds? Now my grandma has to open them.
Tracy: I didn't think I had to.
S: Grandma does that every morning. Whatever, poverty line.
T doesn't say anything. T finishes reading a section of the paper.
A few moments later, S takes the other newspaper.
S: Why didn't you put the newspaper the way you found it? You know I hate it when it's not put back together!
T doesn't say anything.
It's totally okay if you say I'm wrong or more wrong than my sister. I realized this the other day. My sister and I fight the exact same way when we were younger. Like that time back when I was 13 and my sister was 15. I want you to tell me who's wrong or more wrong here.
Cut to Wal-mart.
S: Do you want to get some fries?
T: I want to save my money for something that I want.
S (angrily): Then why are you at the mall?
T (in an even tone): So I could buy the B-Witched cd.
S: Then why didn't you go to HMV?
T: I did. I couldn't find it.
S (stomps her left leg angrily): What do you mean you couldn't find it?
T: I couldn't find it.
There is a pause as they look at each other. T's eyes are half- closed.
S: Then you go to the Pop section and look under B. Then it will be there.
T's eyes droop even more and they're barely open. T looks bored, and tired, and not paying attention.
S: And if you keep looking at me like that, I'll kick your ass.
S walks over and is about to knee T, but T lifts up her leg to block it.
Friends: I remember I emailed the above to my friend Angela a few years ago. She said: "In this case your sister is wrong, however it sounds more like 2 immature siblings arguing." Well Angela dissed me for being immature, but that's okay.
Subtext: The above arguments are what we call subtext. I don't know if you notice it. My sister fights aggressively by saying mean things to hurt your feelings. I fight passive- aggressively. I don't say mean things. In the Wal- Mart scene, I was blatantly trying to get my sister riled by looking at her the wrong way. And when she threatened to beat me up, I was happy that I got her angrier.
She had gotten me angry already with her treating me like I was stupid by asking why I was at the mall and why I hadn't gone to HMV when I did. In today's morning scene, I'm sure you noticed my sister being aggressive towards me. She dissed me straight up by saying "poverty line" as in a shot at me for not making a lot of money. I subtly retaliated by not putting the newspaper the way she wanted it.
If she didn't diss me, I would have put the newspaper the way she wanted it. But since she did diss me, I am going to purposely rile her up. I was also happy that I got her to lash out at me about the newspaper.
Passive- aggressive: I don't care if you guys diss me. I'm sure some of you are thinking: "I would rather fight with your sister. At least she's aggressive, and honest and being straight up with her disdain for you, instead of hiding it. As for you Tracy, I find your passive- aggressive actions way worse. If you got a problem with her, you don't look at her the wrong way or do something that annoys her." But you got to give me points that I didn't yell at her.
Look old habits die hard. I'm sure if my sister reads this, what will she do to annoy me? Well she will say hurtful things to me. Or she will be like: "Don't give Tracy the satisfaction of seeing you riled up."
I'm going to bring up that Grace thing again. Grace was a friend who was annoying me and disrespecting me. When I was 10, I up and left to go to Calgary and didn't tell her. I was gone for a few days and when I got back, she didn't seem angry with me. I wanted her to feel hurt and abandoned that I didn't tell her when I left town. I was mildly disappointed that she didn't lash out at me and said: "How come you left without telling me?" But I was happy to get away from her for a few days.
Norway: I'm sure all of you heard about the massacre in Norway where one man killed 93 people. I was reading in the Edmonton Journal, he was dressed up like a police man and saying: "You can come out now." From an eye witness account, the gun man then shot 20 people who were walking towards him at close range. I was very disturbed by that.
I'll add this as another example to the argument: "People as a whole, suck." I asked Angela if she agreed with that statement.
A: No, because there are a lot of good people in the world who do really great things.
Sayings: Now let's talk about more positive things. I watched this episode of Pretty Little Liars and the line was: "Sometimes when you have a hammer, everything you see is a nail."
The Help: I was watching 20/20 and it discussed the book The Help which will be a movie coming out this summer. It's about black maids who worked for white employees, and raised the white kids as their own. This white woman Kathryn Stockett wrote it because her grandma's black housekeeper Dimitri raised her. This was in the 1960s.
One of the black actresses Viola Davis was interviewed, and discussed how she got the part.
VD: I made voodoo dolls of Jennifer Hudson and Queen Latifah.
lol.
They interviewed Elizabeth who was raised by Arlene. Arlene was later fired. An adult told his son to spray black kids with mace. Elizabeth helped the black kids wash their eyes.
Alma is a black maid and a white woman told her she can't use the washroom in the house that she was working in. She got her money and left, because she didn't need to be treated like that.
Ivy was raised by Dorothy. They haven't seen each other in years. 20/20 helped reunite them. Ivy made a Facebook comment on The Help fan page. 20/20 read it and they got Ivy to come to NY. Dorothy lived in NYC and was taken to Central Park. She was surprised by Ivy. They hugged. Ivy read a heartfelt letter to D: "Thank you for all the hugs you gave me."
The show reported that 50% of nannies are white, and 10% are black.
Music video: This song is from 2006, but I still like it. I actually saw the video "I Will Love Again" by Taras. It's a fast dance song that you can dance to. If you watch the video, it is insightful and deep instead of people dancing. It shows quick clips of relationships that have gone wrong or gone well. You should check it out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcEprw84Qto
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